Hate Me, Love me, Kill me
by sTaR SNipEr
Summary: We take a look into the mind of one of our most beloved charaters. We see how he's changed...and it's not for the best. This is how he feels about his friends betraying him. This is the mind of shadow killer who kills to take away his pain
1. Hate me

Yes, I SHOULD be working on Tears of Blood and Betrayal. I KNOW that. But this just came to me. I know it's not the first type of this story, but I think it's the first R rated one. I won't say who's POV it is till the end of the chapter, but if ya want, I'll write more soon.  
  
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Abandoned. Lonely. Depressed. These were the words that described me. Though it didn't look that way from the outside, on the inside, I was crying myself to sleep. My friends, no...They're not my friends anymore. I know it.  
  
  
  
Hate. Fear. Loathing. Those are the words that describe my feelings towards them. They left me a long time ago but the pain's still there. The pain of rejection, and worthlessness. I hate them. I don't want to see them anymore. But I will, someday, our paths will cross again and they'll see the REAL me; the me that was hiding; waiting for the right moment to spring out.  
  
  
  
I kill for sport; I kill for fun. I kill for a living. My knife is my best friend, and my gun is my greatest ally. I killed people I never knew, I killed people I knew for a short time, but never got too close to.  
  
  
  
Sometimes, I'd make them trust me, love me even. Sometimes, I'd be close to making love to them...then I kill them. That's when it's too close. I kill them, slowly, so they don't know they're dying, until it's too late.  
  
  
  
I know, I'm cruel and heartless. But I wasn't always this way. Some people said I was kind, innocent even. Hah. I never was. It was just a façade. I needed it because I was diagnosed with maniac depression and if I didn't start acting good, I'd be sent back to...  
  
*The place*  
  
  
  
But I won't get into that. I haven't seen that place in almost a decade. Thank god for that. And I'm keeping it that way. I use to be at the top. I used to be the best. Everyone looked up to me, admired me. But now, my eyes have gone cold and so has my heart.  
  
  
  
I'm only a shadow now. No one knows me so no one can hate me. And those that do don't live long enough to tell about me.  
  
  
  
Oh wait, some people do know me. But I hardly see any of them. But I know they're there. I know they're watching me. Watching to see if I make a mistake. Watching to see if I screw up.  
  
  
  
They watch because then, they can hunt _me_. If I mess up, I'm the hunted one. I know, it's sick and twisted. But they can't have failures. So I don't fail them. I kill, and I kill with vengeance.  
  
  
  
I kill, striking my pain into the hearts of millions. I kill because I am in pain. I kill to take away my pain. I am cold, I am heartless; I am an assassin.  
  
  
  
I kill because of my abandonment. I kill because I am hated and feared. Even *they* think I am too dangerous to be part of them. But I am. I'm part of them. I *am* them. I'm everything they could only dream to be, I am every goal they wish to accomplish, I am everything they love and hate.  
  
  
  
They don't care. They just want me to kill. I kill for money, I kill for other people. They pay me to kill them. It makes sense. People want other people dead, but they don't have the skill, or possibly even the guts to do it themselves.  
  
  
  
And that's where I, or shall I say *we* come in. We know how to kill. We have the guts to kill. We *love* to kill.  
  
  
  
Kill. Murder. Rape. It's all the same in my book. You die form it all. If you're alive even after rape, they' you're a fool because you're only giving yourself more pain. But then again, suicide's the easy way out, isn't it?  
  
  
  
So, who cares? No one would, that's why you were raped. Because no one cares. And comes to help you? No one. Keep telling yourself that people still care, but when they hear about what happened, they'll say you're lying and turn away.  
  
  
  
Believe me, it's been done before. And that's why we kill them. We kill the ones that raped them; we kill their friends. We kill everyone that's caused them pain, but they can kill themselves.  
  
  
  
It's funny really. You can get away with killing yourself, but you're too chicken to take another's life. Pathetic. I'm not afraid. I fear nothing but my past. I might not be able to stand up to it, but killing it is different.  
  
  
  
I can't kill unless they want me to. So I wait. Wait for the one-day when they hire me to kill my own friends. They know every little thing about me, and they know I'll be waiting for them to tell me. They won't give them mission to someone else because if they do, I'll kill the one they signed the mission to; even though it might cost me my life. Then my friends are next.  
  
  
  
They know I'm waiting. They know me. They also know that when I do face up and kill them all, I'll finally be one of them. They want me to be truly like them. So they wait, *I* wait. We wait.  
  
  
  
We wait for the day when someone asks me to kill them. And when I do. I'll finally be one of them. A true killer with no heart; a true killer with no emotion. Not even hate. I'll be a true assassin. No holding back.  
  
  
  
I am Yuugi Muhto; bearer of the Millennium Puzzle, and the so-called chosen one. I was raped by the person I trusted most Yami, my darker half. I tried to tell my friends, but they wouldn't listen and turned me away. I was left alone. Truly alone. I turned to murder, rape, and blood spill; my only comfort. I am a killer, I am an assassin.  
  
  
  
Never again will I trust; never again will I love. And when the day comes to murder my own friends and family, I will never again be able to hate.  
  
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Well...surprised? Surprised that the one we love most, has turned out this way? R/R honestly, I'd like to know what you think. There's a purple box there that says submit review. Click "Go" and tell me what ya think. Only up to two flames permitted!!!!! Anymore will be shot right back at you with twice as much power!!!!!!! I mean it; I will hunt you down and skin you alive. I can do that too if I wanted to. But it's too much mess. NEwayz...if ya want me to continue, ya know what to do R/R!!!!!  
  
  
  
Buh Bye ^_^!!  
  
  
  
s.S (a.k.a sTaR SNipEr) 


	2. Ally

Helloz!! I am back!!! Alright, this is for the peeps who want more of mah story than you so much!!! ^_^ . And for the people who just wanted to keep it at that one chapter, that's okay too. I'm just glad I got no flames. YAY!!!!!!! R/R  
  
DISLAIMER: I DON'T OWN YU-GI-OH!!!!!!!!!!  
  
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I smile to myself as my new mission is assigned. It's the one I've been waiting for, the one where after this, I'll finally be one of them. The chance to kill all those who betrayed me.  
  
  
  
My mission will take me back to...*the place*. No, not THAT place, the other one. Domino City; my old home. No I don't have a home. That place never was my home. I've never had a home. And I don't intend to have one now.  
  
  
  
My mission is to kill Katsuya Jounouchi, Ryou Bakura, Yami Bakura, Malik Ishtar, Seto Kaiba, Isis Ishtar, Honda (I don't know his surname or is that it??? @_@) and Mokuba Kaiba. Anzu Mazaki assigned my mission. Tch. Figures. Bitch.  
  
Let's see...what DOES she have against them THIS time?? She won't say. She just says they've been giving her *trouble*. Hah, more like she's giving them trouble. Oh well, she's dead anyway.  
  
  
  
Those who assign us the missions are usually killed along with the victims. It's sick yes, but it's our law. So she's going down.  
  
  
  
Hmm...She hasn't put Yami's name on the list. I shudder at the thought. Of course, she *loves* him. She wants everything to be perfect, just the two of them. Of course, Yami would naturally worry and freak when they're murdered, so she's giving him a shoulder to lean on.  
  
  
  
Pathetic. Bitch. Slut. Whore. Those are all the names she is. And I'm not ashamed to say it. Oh...if only he saw the *real* her. She thinks that by cutting everyone else out of the picture will earn her a nice cozy house with the white picket fence. Fuck her.  
  
  
  
She's not getting Yami. Cause she's out of the picture too. Too bad. Guess he'll have no one to comfort him when she's dead. And I'll make it fun. I'll kill her right in front of him. Hehe.  
  
  
  
Would you stop doing that? Pick up your jaw off the floor. I know. You think I'm cold and heartless and out for revenge. Of course I am. I'm not worth anything now, so I'm a shadow in the dark. And a shadow kills. It smothers its prey to death. It invites to its realm, makes you think it's your friend. Then it swallows you whole and when you finally realize it, it's too late to turn back.  
  
  
  
Shocking isn't it? Well if you can't handle this, leave me alone in my misery. I have places to go, people to kill. I'm surprised I'm even letting know all this about me. But I want SOMEONE to know me, without dying by my hand. I want to be legend. If a memory's the only thing that's left of me when I die, then it's enough.  
  
  
  
Anyways, back to the way I'm murdering them. Hm...Jounouchi and Honda. They'll be too easy. Next...Ryou Bakura and his Yami. I'll kill them together. That won't be too hard.  
  
  
  
Isis and her brother, Seto and Mokuba... Malik and Seto could become assassins; Mokuba and Isis are so dead. Unless I can do something about Mokuba...Hm...  
  
  
  
So many to kill so little time to do so. Every mission I'm assigned to, I get a time limit. If I exceed the time limit I'm dead meat. They'll send assassins to murder me on the spot the second the hand hit midnight for the next day. The precise second after midnight is when my time is up. I failed them. And I would die.  
  
  
  
But it's never happened. I was really close to failing one time, but that's because the person was difficult. She drugged me, but she died almost two seconds before midnight. I pulled out my gun and shot her. It was by mistake really but it got the job done.  
  
  
  
Ever since then I've been careful and made precise plans. It's easy to become a great assassin but it's just as easy to fail. And when you fail, you die.  
  
  
  
But I'm not afraid of death. When the day comes to my passing, good or bad, I'll welcome it with open arms. For death is the next greatest adventure.  
  
  
  
They are many ways to die when you're like me. There are many rules to follow as well. And just to fill you're curiosity I'll tell you some of them.  
  
  
  
1) We kill only the prey we are assigned. Nothing else. WE don't need the extra mess.  
  
2) WE don't kill one of our own. Unless that person has failed us, and has earned the right to be hunted, we don't kill them. If one does, than he or she becomes the hunted.  
  
3) When someone fails to complete their mission properly, they become the hunted. We are given a strict time limit and the very second our time is up, we are immediately hunted down.  
  
  
  
Well, that's about it. Well, the basics, anyway. If you want more, take the test, join our order, then read the rulebook. Simple as that. So, if ya can't take this now, LEAVE. It makes no difference to me whether you're here or not.  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~Someone's POV~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The knife is next to me. I run my fingers along its smooth surface. I get blood on my fingers. Oh no, not MY blood, the blood of another. One that I've hated for so long. No, it's not Yuugi...too bad. But it's someone. And I'll tell you who.  
  
  
  
My father. Well, my step father anyway. I've always been hesitant about killing, but when he came here tonight, and attempted to rape the one person I care about most, all those years of pain and angst came flooding back to me.  
  
  
  
So I did it. He's dead. Right next to me. Suddenly, hundreds of shadows appear out of nowhere. What the hell?! I am suddenly knocked out and the last thing I hear before I black out is "assassin"  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~Back to Yuugi~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
I hear a knock at my door. "What?" I ask. "The council wishes to see you" someone called from the other side. I sat up. The council was a group of seven of the most deadly people in the world. They ran this whole place.  
  
  
  
I walk into the dark room, showing no signs of fear for I know, I have none. "What do you wish of me?" I ask. Whispers ran throughout them. I squint to see where they are. They have never shown their faces to anyone, not even amongst themselves, or so I am told and one said,  
  
  
  
"We would like you to take an apprentice" I was shocked. An apprentice. To train. But what about my mission? Huh? I CANNOT and WILL NOT put the mission on hold. But then again, they make all the decisions. I gulp.  
  
  
  
"Why?" I ask simply. "I have a mission to fulfill, I cannot just start training some amateur killer right now. You know how long I've been waiting for this moment. This time." "We know" another one replies. "We think he will be useful to you in your mission though"  
  
  
  
I blink. "How?" I ask. I really don't think a novice following me around helps much. "We think you know him. He WILL be useful. And he won't take long to train, he's already had his first kill" they said.  
  
  
  
I blink again. "Who is he?" I ask. One of the council snaps his/her finger and the shadows appear with a limp figure. They drop him down and I recognize the figure immediately.  
  
Seto Kaiba.  
  
I bend down and stroked his face. There's blood on it. But I see no wound. They're right. He's already had his first kill. But who was it? My answer is sent straight at me; in the form of a knife.  
  
  
  
I didn't flinch. I didn't even breathe at it cut only a few strands of my hair. I growled at the being who threw it and she steps out of the darkness. Oh great. Just great.  
  
  
  
Abbie. French, shoulder length hair, brunette, and one of the most dangerous assassins in our order. She's killed over three hundred, and still going. I don't hate her, yet I don't like that much either.  
  
  
  
But I respect her. She's the one who found me, brought me here, almost begged for me to be tested, she got me here, she trained me, so she deserves my utter respect. I see her smirk. "Same as always" she says. "You never flinch"  
  
  
  
I nod. "Haven't seen you in a while" I replied. "How many?" "Five hundred, going for a thousand" she replied. My eyes grow wide but I am not surprised. "Four hundred seventy six" I reply. "I'm tailing you"  
  
  
  
She smirks again. "I see you've met one of you prey," she says. "You going to keep him or not?" I shrug. "That's for the council to decide" I reply and my eyes dart back to the people behind me.  
  
  
  
One of them replies, "You should keep him. He will be a great ally to your mission. Plus, Abbie is also watching you. She will cover up all the killings the media reports." I nod and glance back at my trainer.  
  
  
  
Her eyes are cold, like mine. She taught me never to trust, never to feel any emotion, because if I did, it would be the death of me. She holds only one emotion. And that is directed toward me. Respect. And at one point compassion; love  
  
  
  
I won't get into that. It's all past. All we know is that it's our mission to kill. And she knows just as well as I how long I've been waiting for this. Besides, Seto didn't really bother me anyways. Maybe he could be useful after all.  
  
  
  
I hear a moan come from the corner. Oh shit, he's waking up. He gets up and takes in his surroundings. He doesn't seem scared, or even alarmed. Suddenly, his whole expression changes and his face turns to mine; and our cold, ice like eyes, amethyst and cerulean meet each other.  
  
  
  
His expression turns from surprise, to recognition to horror in a matter of five seconds. I'm not surprised. "Kaiba" I hear myself say coldly. "Yuugi" he replies back with the same tone. Well at least he hasn't lost his voice.  
  
  
  
"I smirk. "Do you want to know why you're here?" I ask and walk up to him. There's blood everywhere. On his clothes, skin, and some in his hair. It was defenantly an amateur kill but there was something quite interesting about it. I brush a strand on his hair away from his eyes. He doesn't flinch.  
  
  
  
"Can I guess?" he asks keeping the tone he had before. I nod. "Sure, why not?" I say in a mocking tone. He narrows his eyes but answers simply, "It was because I killed someone" I smirk again. "Well, you ARE a genius" I say sarcastically.  
  
  
  
He was about to reply when I help up a finger to his lips. "But that's not the only reason" I say. "There's something special about the way you kill. You do a thorough job, you make sure your victim suffers, you love the scent of their blood so you kill them slowly. Their screams are musical notes playing on a harp; their agony is your pleasure."  
  
  
  
I smirk at his wide eyes of horror and continue. "You kill them softly, so no one knows, you hide their bodies so no will know they're gone. You inflict your own pain straight into them and you make sure they are truly dead. You listen closely as their heart beats its last time and they breathe their last breaths."  
  
  
  
Kaiba looked sick now and I was going to continue when I was interrupted. "Yuugi, stop trying to scare him, he's only had one kill. He's not used to the scent of blood like we are. We thrive on it." It was Abbie.  
  
  
  
I smirk. "But he should know at least, what it's like to kill. The rush, the adrenaline, the screams of horror and pure terror." I reply. "He should know." "I do" Seto replied back. "I know how it feels; I just killed a few hours ago."  
  
  
  
I turn around, surprised at his comment. "Then why did you look so sick when I explained it all to you?" I ask. "Because" he replied. "It all came from you"  
  
  
  
I am in a state of shock. But it quickly turns to anger. I strike him a hard blow across the face that knocks him to the ground. "Are you saying that you think I'm weak?" I demanded. "Are you saying that you think I shouldn't be here? Huh? Answer me!" I cry out.  
  
  
  
He looks up to me, his cold eyes still there but something's changed about them. There's what? Pity? Compassion? I can't believe it. He pities me! Me! Yuugi Muhto. God, what the hell is going on?!?!  
  
  
  
Then I see it. The mark. The mark that makes him truly one of us. A crimson red tear. I see it fall freely form his face as if were just an ordinary one. I catch in my hand before it falls forever to the darkness. I gasp when I see it.  
  
  
  
It's not a pure tear. Pure tears are fully crimson and made of blood. But his is mixed with water. And there's only one other person whose tear is exactly like that. Only one other person in the order, who didn't fit in, just because he still held emotion.  
  
  
  
Mine. My tear was mixed with water. I feel tears going down my cheek. I blink. Taking from the look Seto is giving me, they are not ordinary tears. I catch one in my hand. Just like I thought. My tears are the darkest crimson but they are tainted with water. And water shows emotion.  
  
  
  
I feel someone place a tissue across my face. It's Abbie. She also places one on Seto's face, for he is crying as much as I am now. "So it is done," she says. "You're one of us, Seto Kaiba."  
  
  
  
I know she's right. Once we cry our crimson tears, we are no longer humans. We are now shadows of the dark. And a shadow is no friend to anyone.  
  
  
  
I notice something else. He's almost, no, IS exactly like me. Both our tears have mixed with water. So we still hold on to the past. Our past fears, emotions, and loves. "Seto..." I whisper. I don't get a reply. Instead, he breaks down and cries on my shoulder.  
  
  
  
Had it been anyone else, I would have pushed him away disgusted. But he needed me right now. And even though I'll never admit it, well at least no OUTLOUD to anyone, though the council will know, they ALWAYS know, I need him right now as well.  
  
  
  
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Okiz, I just had to expend this chapter so yeah here we go!!!!!  
  
  
  
Three days have passed. It doesn't take long for Seto to learn. Like me, we learned extremely quickly. But personally, I think it's a little harsh to put him on a mission, especially if the mission is MINE after he just made his first kill.  
  
  
  
I remember, it took quite a while to get used to it all. I was trained for two months before my first kill. And even after that, it took me another month or so to recover from it. But then again, Seto's different. Like he's ready for anything. I hope he is.  
  
  
  
The simulation ended. I clap solemnly at his performance. He did a good job. When we do simulations, it's like going on a real mission; only, the people are either robots or dummies. I smirk to see that he completely trashed it to beyond repair.  
  
  
  
He looks up at me and narrows his eyes. I smirk again. "Good job" I say and walk away. Once downstairs, I hear him walking toward me. "Yuugi" he says. "Yes?" I reply. "What do you wish of me Kaiba?"  
  
  
  
He holds up a folder. Oh shit. It's my file. How the hell did he get THAT? Damnit, Abbie must have shown it to him. Damn her. Damn her to fucking hell.  
  
  
  
"Yuugi, I read it all. Is it true?" he asks me. I turn around and my cold eyes meet his. Only, his eyes weren't the cold ones I was so used to. They were soft, and filled with compassion, and Damnit, pity.  
  
  
  
"Yes" I say coldly my tone dripping with venom. "It's none of your business anyway. Besides, I thought you pitied no one." His eyes narrow again and I see the coldness return once again to him.  
  
  
  
"Is that why you're doing this?" he asks me. "To take away your pain?" I nod. "Seto, you don't know what I've gone through, been through. Well, now you do actually but still, what's past is past, I can't turn back the hands of time"  
  
  
  
He sighs. "Yes I do. I've been through every single thing, down to the last detail you've been through. He throws another folder to me. It's HIS file. I open it and quickly scan everything. I close it after five minutes. He's right. I laugh.  
  
  
  
He looks surprised at my reaction, which makes me laugh even harder. The sound is foreign to me, one, because I haven't laughed in a long time, two because it was hollow and empty.  
  
  
  
"Seto" I say. "That's life. What are you going to do about it?" I ask. He shakes his head. "Nothing" he replied. "I'm one of you now, aren't I? Everyday is this hellhole, I lose part of me. The you I knew once is almost gone. But not completely. For you, it's not to late to turn back, but for me, it's always been too late."  
  
  
  
He turns on his heel and leaves me shocked at his words. "He's right you know" came another voice. It was Abbie. "What do you want?" I ask her coldly. She smirks. "Kaiba's been one of us, even BEFORE he came here. But he still holds on to one thing, his brother Mokuba, and that's why his tears are like yours. But...his mission is to kill his only family tonight, and that he will. Then, he is truly one of us." She replies.  
  
  
  
I'm shocked now. I would NEVER picture Kaiba killing Mokuba. But then again, people change, don't they? Look at me. "Yuugi" she says. "You were never supposed to come here, to be us. But we made you. We twisted, turned, and bent you to our will. But it's not too late for you. Anyone here would like a second chance t reprimand the past. Even me. But we can't. However, you can do that."  
  
  
  
"How?" I ask. "My friends all hate me" She shakes her head. "Only one does, and she will die." Abbie replied. I nod. Tea. Maybe. Maybe if she was gone, then..."No" I say. "I won't turn back." Abbie seems only mildly surprised by my answer. "Then you're ready to do this," she said. I nod.  
  
  
  
Abbie takes out a watch from he pocket. She hands it to me. "You have thirty one days, twenty three hours, fifty five minutes and forty three seconds. Use your time wisely. You are assigned to kill Yami, Honda, Jounouchi, Anzu, Ishizu, and Ryou. Malik and Bakura will be brought back for testing. They could be useful to us. I nod as the timer starts counting down.  
  
  
  
"Seto's already at Domino." Abbie added. "He won't interrupt you. I will be there in approximately three days. Kill Jou and Honda just before the sunsets. Kill the rest when and wherever you please. Go. NOW!" and the timer starts counting down. I run the fastest I've ever run in my life.  
  
  
  
Hate, Fear, Loathing. I'll never be able to feel these emotions again. Loneliness, Abandonment, Depression. They'll never bother me again. This is it. I'm finally going. My emotions are no longer there and forever locked away.  
  
  
  
What's done is done  
  
What's past is past  
  
Don't cry over spilled milk  
  
You can't turn back the hands of time  
  
Everything can be fixed  
  
But it's not the same as before  
  
For the memory of breaking all over again  
  
Can be the one only thing that haunts your mind  
  
The sky is red  
  
The sun is dim  
  
Blood has been spilled this night  
  
And innocence is lost once more  
  
Hate me, Love me, Kill me  
  
For nothing's more painful  
  
Than betraying the trust and friendship  
  
That was once there before.  
  
  
  
I am Yuugi Muhto. I will never again be able to trust. I will never love, nor hate. My emotions have disappeared and so has my soul. I am an empty shell of a being. Once they are all gone I will never ever be able to turn back.  
  
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Okiz...I wrote a REALLY LONG chapter. Well, that's b/c I sorta combined chapter two with chap three but hey, who cares?? More for your reading please!!! R/R plz!!!! 


	3. Deadly Love

DISCLAIMER: I DON"T OWN YU-GI-OH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Helloz, I thought we weren't allowed to update till Sunday but hey, we are now!! ^_^ R/R, I hope this is god

Oh yeah, flamers BEWARE!!!! I know who you are; I know what you did last summer. Ok...no I don't I'm just tryin to scare ya! ^_^. But if you flame, I do know the numbers of some assassin friends of mine and I'm not kidding this time.….…...

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I'm here. The trip wasn't so long. It's a blur really, I hardly remember it. When you're a shadow like me, we travel differently. We travel through dimensions. Dimensions we've never know they existed till we used them. But we go so fast we arrive at our destination without even knowing we left.

It's odd really. But I don't care. It's better than traveling by plane or helicopter or...hmm...I can't remember any more means of transportation by human beings. I'm not surprised. It's been five years since I left this place so I forgot everything basically.

I take a deep breath and sigh. The air is the same as it was when I left. It smells like home. Home. I want to gag at just thinking of that word. I have no home. The world banished me to a realm of shadows, when all law is defined and emotion is something foreign to its inhabitants.

Suddenly, I hear a scream. It was far of and distant and most people wouldn't have even have heard it, even with the most advanced technology. But I heard it. I was trained to hear it. Over the years, I trained all my senses. I trained myself to smell fear a mile away, to hear a whisper on the other side of the planet, to see my prey clearly hundreds of miles away.

I am a supernatural being. Most would kill to have what I possess. Of course, some are move advanced in their skills than I but took forever for them to learn while I managed them in such a short time. I close my eyes and feel my body being transported to the exact area from which the sound came.

I emerge from the shadows in a rather large house. In front of me was quite a sight. This was Seto's house. His perfectly white coat was drenched in blood, his own flesh and blood's blood. 

Mokuba. He's there, lying helplessly on the floor. "Ni-Sama" he says weakly and hoarsely. "Doushite?" Then I see it. He's crying. The great Seto Kaiba is crying. 

But they're not normal tears. They're blood tears. Pure blood tears. So...he's finally one of us. I see them stream down his face and onto the already stained carpeted floor. "I'm sorry Mokuba. I'm so sorry" he says. He attempts to blink back his tears but they flow freely. "I'm sorry..." and he delivers the final blow.

Mokuba didn't even wince. But before he died, he turned to me. Although I tried to stay hidden, I saw the look in his eyes. It wasn't fear, it wasn't anger, it was...oh hell no. Pity. I saw Pity in his eyes. Damnit, why does everyone pity me?? God!!!

I feel eyes upon me and look up to see Seto glaring at me. I smirk and clap. "Bravo, Seto" I say. "You're finally a shadow. Just like us" I hear him growl in resent. I sigh. "Oh come off it, it wasn't THAT hard was it?" I ask sarcastically.

He looks over to his now dead brother then sighs, the tears still flowing freely down his cheek. I roll my eyes but walk over to him. My arms instinctively wrap around his waist. He flinches but I only tighten my grip. "You know what you have to do," I whisper seductively into his ear. "Once you do, you're really what we are. You have nothing left Seto Kaiba so just give it up. Do it"

He pauses and closes his eyes. I can tell he's having difficulty with this, but then, who wouldn't? I know I'll have to do it when I kill Yami, Jiichan already dead by old age so Yami's close enough to blood family as can be. It's another one of our laws. You'll see soon enough.

I loosen my hold on him and he bends down to his brother. "Lord Ra of the heaven and Earth help me" he says. I laugh. "No one can help you Seto. Just do it. Now" I say coldly. He sighs and runs his hand along Mokuba's chest. He rips of the shirt with ease. His thin frail fingers trail his younger brother's chest before they plunge deep into his chest.

He pulls his hand out suddenly, a bloody lump in his hands. I smile. He did it. He managed to pull Mokuba's heart out, literally, and in perfect condition too. I feel my tongue run across my lips, oh how I lust for blood right about now.

He closes his eyes and brings the organ to his lips. I hear suck quite noisily on the blood that is inside. After removing the excess blood, he engulfs it into his mouth and swallows the heart whole.

I can see him shivering. He's probably still queasy. Ah well. He was able to do it did he not? What? Tch, I should've known. You're sickened by this are you not? Then leave. Because this is only the initiation. There are far worse things than this that we must do. We thrive on blood, we thrive on life. We eat the flesh of the living for human food cannot be digested by us.

It's sick isn't it? Well, that's life. Deal with it or leave this place. I don't need you here. I see him glare at me, blood now dripping form his mouth. He licks it off before disappearing into the shadows. He's gone. His mission was fulfilled. I won't see him ever again.

He was my apprentice but now he's one of us. He was under my wing but now he's taken flight. He was dependant on me but now he's broken away. I'll never see him again, not in this life, or the next. Because he's now an independent shadow. He doesn't need me. I don't need him. End of story.

There's noting more left to do here. I take the knife out of Mokuba's chest. With one glare it has now become a pile of rotted ash. My will power is weak at the present moment so I hesitate not to drink his blood. Mmmmmm It's so sweet. So pure, like mine used to be they said. But I know it's not now. My blood is tainted, black, and sour.

I close my eyes and I'm suddenly at the park again. No, not the park, I'm in front of Jounouchi's house. I look at my hands, smeared in blood. I realize that probably my whole body is engulfed in blood. I shake my head. This will never do.

The shadows have once surrounded me. I can feel them piercing at me clothes to the very depths of my skin. I'm once again in front of Jounouchi's house. I examine myself and am pleased to see that I am clean. Good, now this façade will fool him. 

I rub dirt all over myself and I made sure I left some dried blood on my clothes. If I look like a total wreck, there's no doubt he'll take me in. I walk up to the door and ring the doorbell. There's no answer so I ring again and again till I hear someone say, "All right already!!! I'm coming, keep your damn pants on!!" I'm smirking. This is going to be too easy. 

I smirk as I see Jounouchi's shocked eyes. He wasn't expecting me was he? I put on a fake look of weakness and helplessness, immediately collapsing into his arms. I feign unconsciousness and he immediately takes me in. Good. I feel the blade that's up my sleeve and run my fingers across its smooth surface. My thoughts of blood are interrupted as I hear what he's saying.

"Oh man...Yuge, how'd you get like this?" he ponders to himself, unaware that I can hear. Tch. This is too easy. But my curiosity takes over as I realize what else he has to say. "Oh god, if you were awake now, I beg on hands and knees for forgiveness for what I did to you." He said frantically. I almost want to laugh. I could tell he was ruffling his hair in stress. I felt myself laid down on a soft surface and his arms leave my body. I knew he was going to get some help of some sort.

I didn't need to open my eyes to see his home. It was a mess. Apparently, organization wasn't one of Jou's strong points and never was. But in this situation, this is actually helpful. Evidence is harder to find in a rat's nest than in fine-combed wool. And Jou wouldn't even know what hit him. I just had to play the innocent lost soul for a while.

I feel a cool and wet cloth placed on my head. I wince as the sudden change of temperature but quickly relax after a few seconds. I also feel Jou's hand undoing the top buttons on my shirt. (Ack!! No, no lemon thank you!) His hands rested on my throat as he checked my breathing. To make it more evident, I rasped and wheezed, making it sound like I had been running from something, or someone.

I also whined, my eyes still shut, as if I slept with trouble. I could feel his hands running along my head and chest, checking to see if I was healthy. His eyes were on me, I could tell, and they were full of worry and sadness. There was even.…...argh, I hate it. Pity. Damn fucking pity. If I wasn't trying to lay low, I would have hurt him so bad right now.

My eyes snap open suddenly and Jou's eyes widen as well. I look down at his hands, which seem to be on me in a suggestive way. He pulls away immediately, stuttering. "Oh man...s...so...sorry Yuge. I had no idea you were awake" I look up at him and manage to smile, though I make it look weak. "It's o...o...okay Jou" I say and then I fake a cough, but it sounds real enough to my ex best friend.

"J...Jou..." I whisper trying to sound as pathetic as possible. "W...where...a...am...I" "You're at my place" Jou says warmly. "And, I'm going to call the Game Shop, ok? I'm sure Yami would like to see you..." "NOO!!!" I scream out, mostly in anger but I coated it with fear. "Jou...please..." I said softly, not daring to cry, for my tears would be red. "I can't...won't go back to him...Jou...don't make me go back" I whimper.

I feel him stroke my hair. "Yuge, I know what he did to you. And I wanted to believe you, I swear. But something wrong happened. I don't even think 'I' know what I did Yuge, but whatever it was, I never knew I did it and I promise everything will be okay now" he says reassuringly.

I take into perspective what he had said to me. Him...not knowing what he did? How he broke my spirit, and almost my back. Hah. He knew it, I know. He's just trying to sugarcoat it all with reassurances then go back to torturing me again. Just like Anzu. She said she was my friend, she said she cared for me, but all she cared about was herself.

I look up at him and stare into his eyes. Amber, with a sort of orange glow to them. I look and see pity, compassion, and...regret? He ACTUALLY regrets what he did. I think hell finally froze over. Seriously. I mean, they all turned me away, left me a broken spirit, with nothing to do but run and hide in the shadows.

But there's something else in his eyes. It's not pity, I found that already. It's something like compassion and desire...oh no...I shake my head then look away. I didn't just see that. I shut my eyes and try to shake that look he gave me out of my head. "Yuge?" I hear him ask and my eyes open and stare into his once more, almost piercing his very soul.

Then I see it. The one feeling I abandoned long ago that's trying to haunt me again. Love. I see love in his eyes. But that can't be true, can it. I search everywhere, looking for some sort of different answer. But it's still there. That damn look. The look of love. Fuck. I just want to scream and rip his eyes out so that I can't see him look at me that way.

Then, an idea strikes me. Maybe he does love me. Maybe he is telling the truth. But that won't stop my judgment. But it brings up an interesting idea. An idea I thought about in my head for a long time and now, I think I can prove my theory. But for now, I have to do my job. I can feel them. They're watching me, almost holding their breath to see if I do it right.

I look up once more into Jou's eyes. Then, I do the unrespectable. At least to him. But to me, it's just a new way to kill someone. I kiss him. MY lips are pressed against his now and I kiss him with full passion and hard cold desire. I feel him kiss me back, and I know that he loves me. Hmm...This makes it more interesting.

The blade slides out form under my sleeve. I slide slowly down his back, concealing it with my own body heat, so that it is like an extension to my body. I make his mind concentrate on my and only me as I slide the blade down lower, cutting his flesh slowly apart.

It's so easy to lose yourself in a moment. But sometimes, that can be deadly. He still doesn't notice the blood dripping down his back. I've ripped off his shirt and mine is almost gone. I run my fingers through his hair, whispering him words of desperation, words that said I needed this, and that I needed him. I put on the act that I wanted him to take me.

But I won't let him get too close. He pauses before seeing the look of desperation in my eyes and is more than happy to fulfill my wishes. I smirk to myself as I feel him unbutton my pants slowly. I can feel him kissing me everywhere and he has yet to notice the blood that is falling form his back. Then, I raise it. As high as my arm could go, the already covered blood knife.…...

Went straight into his back, striking him, directly at the very center of his heart. I knew this because it came right out of his chest, blood oozing from it. I saw him fall to the ground as I spat in his face. "You basterd" I said harshly kicking me. "I'll never love trash like you"

I began to walk away, the shadows that had come to watching my performance following me. But then, I heard a faint whisper. "Yu...gi..." It was Jou. He was attempting to get up. I turned around and look at him with cold eyes. "What do you want?" I asked my tone dripping with venom. "Why?" was the only word that came out of his mouth before he finally gave up and fell helplessly to the floor.

I'm shocked by his question. WHY?!!?!?! Why?!?!?! I'll tell you why. The one person I thought I could trust raped me, my friends turned me away, then totally disowned me, and you're asking why I turned out like this? God, of all the stupidest questions to ask before you die. I swear some people are so stupid.

I walk out of the house, my deed done. I breathe the fresh air, the smell of blood gone for now, but the stench lives forever within me. I feel I cold grasp on my shoulder, but I know whom it is. "Abbie" I saw quietly. "Have you ever seen a sunset like this one?" I ask carelessly not caring if she's listening.

I feel her grip tighten slightly as she nods. " I have Yuugi. I have" she replies to me. I turn to her and look directly into the cold emotionless eyes that reflect my own. "When?" I asked her. She sighed and shook her head. The shadows took her leave and before she did, she said simply "When I killed my best friend" 

And then, she was gone. I knew, I'd never see her again as well and I would be lucky if I did. She's gone now, I no longer need her. I can feel the tears flowing down my cheeks. They're no longer blood stained. I cry with blood now as well all do. But my job isn't done yet. I haven't killed all I love. Or used to love anyway.

I am Yuugi Muhto, the shadow of darkness, the bringer of light. I chose my destiny once, and that was to be good and kind. But now, I have chosen it once again. I chose the path of darkness and sorrow. And once, I'm truly gone, you'll never hear my name or voice ever again.

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Well, that's it for now. I have the "Diary of An Assassin" side fic posted up, R/R plz!!!!! ^________^

Buh Bye!

s.S (aka sTaR SNipEr)


	4. The Diary of An Assasin

Helloz!!! This not a chapter, but it is for your reading pleasure. I managed to snag Yuugi, Yami, and Jou's diary. Although Yami hasn't been mentioned much, I still wrote a poem for him anyhow. And of course, you'll see WHY I titled this story "Hate Me, Love Me, Kill me"

YUUGI"S DIARY

2/10/2003

By myself. In my world. I don't even know why I keep this god-forsaken thing. Oh well. I need to let out some steam.

Hate me, Love me, Kill me

Break me into a million tiny pieces

Hate me, Love me, Kill me

Steal away my innocence

Hate me, Love me, Kill me

You try to make it right

Hate me, Love me, Kill me

Then break me all over again

I don't know where I got this from. Oh well, it's how I feel.

2/12/2003

I am the shadow in darkness, the bringer of light. My destiny was to be good and pure, but my heart is a block of ice. Nothing will touch me, nothing will break me. You'll be dead before you know it; if you even catch a glimpse of me. I was broken once before, by someone whom I thought I loved. But I learned from my mistakes, and I'm stronger than before. Hate me, love me, kill me. Like it was there before. I'll turn to the darkness, and you'll no longer see me, forever more.

Hm...I could be a poet. Ah well, hey! Get out of here. Grrr...oh well, you've seen already anyways. Leave now, before, I give you a most painful death.

YAMI"S DIARY

Do you know what's it like

To be completely and truly alone?

No, I guess you don't

How would you be able to live with yourself

Knowing that you were the reason the love of your life was chased away?

I've searched for you forever

How I've longed to hold you close

But then I did the unforgivable

And stole away your innocence

Hate me, love me, kill me

That's all my life is worth

Why have I been damned

With this horrid curse form birth?

My beautiful, innocent light

Where are you now?

Will I ever see you face shining bright

Or are you forever gone?

Aishiteru.

JOU"S DIARY

Have you ever gotten the feeling

That you were in heaven, then in hell?

That's how I felt

My best friend, my love

He had come back to me

I wanted to drown him in kisses

And hold him in my arms forever

I felt his lips press against mine

And I knew I was in heaven

But nothing was what it seemed

And he literally ripped out my heart

Hate me, Love me, Kill me

That's what he did to my life

I offered him all I had to give

And he ripped it all away

What did I do wrong?

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Okiz, well, anyway, R/R!!!! ^_^

Buh Bye!!

s.S (a.k.a sTaR SNipEr)


	5. Love me

DISCLAIMER: I DON"T OWN YU-GI-OH!!!!!

Oh yeah, flamers, remember that I OWN this organization. I can send any of mah assasins to go off and kill you if I wanted to do so. So beware!!!

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It's dark. Cold. Empty. Lifeless. I'm staring at what USED to be the remnants of I place I used to reside in. The Game Shop. I refuse to call it home, because, well, it never really was.  It was, just that. Dust has collected over it for the passing years and it was shuttered up and closed. But someone still resides here. I can feel it. That's Yami's life force.

But he's not alone. Someone's there, someone, oh fucking hell. SHE'S there. Damnit, bitch probably moved in with him or something. I sighed and scanned the house. Yami was somewhere off, probably in the shower and Anzu; I shudder as I remember her name. Anzu is in the next room. Good, she's alone. It's my turn to make my move.

My thoughts wander to that one small room and suddenly, I'm there. It's no surprise. I'll kill you for what you did to me. How you tore the down the only defense I put up to keep me from going insane. You fucking bitch, I hope you'll burn in hell for all the shit you've cause me.

She's right in front of me now, and I make my move. MY silver blade is instantly at her neck and she gasped at the sudden movement. He eyes fearfully wander to me, and she gaps in horror. "Y...Yuugi?" she whispered breathlessly. I smirk. "You fucking bitch" I say coldly to her and lick my lips. "You're gonna die"

"NNOOO!!" she screams out and somehow, slips from my grasp. "I won't let you do this not after everything I've worked for!!!" I laugh. "Yeah, you broke me you bitch, I know you did, you somehow got hold of that damn Millennium Rod of Malik's and you made everyone hate me. Didn't you?"

She's shocked by what I said but then gives an equal glare. "What d ya think?" she replied trying to match my tone. "I tried every little thing to get Yami's attention but no...He only pay attention to his HIKARI!!!!!" she screamed. "I tried to play nice, pretended that I loved both of you, but then it got too much. I had to do something about it or I'd lose him to YOU forever"

I smirk. This is what I want to hear. This is what HE deserves to hear. And he is. Obviously, he can't recognize me, but his mouth is open in horror as he listens behind the door. I lick my lips again and shrug. "You're such a bitch, ya know that. You're self centered, and you don't give a fuck about anyone but yourself." I say venom literally in my tone.

She's still glaring. "Well it worked, didn't it?" she asked. "I got what I wanted and you, disappeared forever. Of course, he needed a shoulder to cry on, and look, here I was." She smirked obviously victorious. Suddenly, the door opened. Yami's there, in shock and rage.

"You..." he glared looking like he was going to kill her. "You...you..." The bitch suddenly turned around, her eyes in shock. "OMG Yami, I mean, I..." she dared never utter another word. Her lifeless body dropped to the floor, blood spilling all over the floor.

I look at the heart in my hand. I take some blood form it, tasting the bitterness then spitting it out. Then, without hesitation, I squeeze it, and it explodes, blood splattering all over the walls. "Damn fucking whore" I say, loud enough for my so-called darkness to hear. I look into his eyes and I see him flinch, then gasp.

He's seen it then. MY eyes. They're cold, lifeless. He's cowering in fear under my gaze and then I realize that I have the upper hand over him. I walk over and my hands roam his body. "Well, well," I whisper seductively into his ear. "Who do we have here?" I can feel him suddenly tensing at the contact.

I lick his upper ear and he defenantly shuddered at that. My hands leave his body as I make my exit. "Let this be a warning to you, my darkness. You're all going to die, one by one, you will fall. And when you do, the world will surrender to my rule and this place will be a living hell"

Then I'm gone. Simple as that. I've reappeared outside, in the park. I sigh and collapse into a bench. My headache is getting worse; the air here is nothing to the one I'm used to. It's so...fresh. Seemingly untouched by pollution somehow, even with all these mass buildings everywhere. The atmosphere alone could kill me.

And that throws me into a fit. I'm mad at myself, angered that I have let the air alone be my vulnerability. In the middle of a rant, a small girl walks up to me. "Scuse me, mister, but why are you screaming at nothing?" she asks sweetly and politely.

I look down at her and try to glare but then I realize I can't. I turn away and say softly, "Little girl, have you ever been hurt?" She looks up at me again and say, "Uh huh, just yesterday, I got this scrape on mah knee and..." "Shh..." was my reply. "Not like that" I say quietly. "On the inside. You were hurt so much that no doctor or band-aid could heal you?"

She seemed to give it some thought before nodding slowly. "Yeah..." she said sadly. I'm shocked at her response. I turn to her and bend down to her level. "When?" I asked her. She sighed then replied, "When my mama died"

I'm not surprised. Losing someone you love is painful. "And how long ago did she die?" I asked. She shrugged. "I don't know, but mah dad and the po-lice said is was by anh asin" she replied. "An asin?" I ask her. She shrugged again. "I don't know how ta pronounce it buh they said it was a person who killed peoples for money."

My eyes are wide now. "An assassin" I breathlessly whisper. That was what I was. That is who I was. She was probably one of those I had hurt in my own pain. "When did she die?" I asked her, my hand caressing her face. She flinched but held my hand there. "When I was three." She replied.

"And how old are you know?" "Eight"  I try my hardest to keep from gasping. Five years ago and it was evident she was still hurting inside. "W...what was her name?" She looked up at me. "You ask a lot of questions mister" she said. I managed a half smiled. "I am very curious my dear" I replied. She smiled. "Her name was Claire. Claire Rosemary" she smiled.

I felt the liquid drain form my face. Claire Rosemary. My first kill. That was so long ago, when I was inexperienced and untrained. I learned later that she survived but only for a few moments. And here was her offspring, just talking to me like I was a close relative.

I tried to smile. "It's a beautiful name. But shouldn't you go home?" I asked. "Isn't your father worried about you?" I saw her flinch. "Um...daddy doesn't really like me" she said pulling away from me now. But I moved closer and then I saw the red mark on her face. "Did her hurt you?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Don't tell anyone, please. Daddy said he'd do something bad and I don't even know what it means" she replied frightfully. "Shh...it's okay" I said to her reassuringly. "I won't tell, just tell me, what did he say?" She shrugged. "I don't know what it means but he said I'd lose my innocence."

I clenched my fists in anger. This girl was what, 8? How dare he? Just like what Yami did to me. Oh gods, Yami. Remembering is such a pain. I can feel the whole world spinning, but I keep myself there, just for the girl. I don't know how I've suddenly grown attached to this young one, but I have.

"What's your name?" I asked. She smiled. "I'm Hikari. What's you name?" she asked innocently. I manage a weak smile. "Yuugi" I reply. "Oh" she replied. "I like that name. Wanna be friends?" I laughed a little, though the sound was foreign to me.

"Hikari, why would you want to be friends with a killer?" I ask and then sit back down. "Who'd ever care for someone like me?" I whispered. "What do ya mean?" she asked. "You haven't killed anyone" she said. I look at her sadly. "Oh but I have" I replied. "Countless thousands, those whom I've never even known, Hikari" I replied. Then I looked at her again. "I killed you mother" 

She's in shock, I know it. She probably hates me, and she's going to try and call the police or something. Or even her dad if she's desperate. But then, I got something unexpected. A hug. "It's okay" she said and buried her face into my chest. I was shocked. I expected her to yell and scream at me, blame me for the fact he perfect life was shattered. "Bu...but...don't you hate me?" I asked slightly confused.

She shook her head. "Mama said that hate never solved anything. I saw her before she died. She said that the person who killed her would come back. And she said that I had to forgive him. She knew. She said he was lonely and needed a friend." Hikari said.

I can't hold it back. My tears are falling freely form my cheeks and I don't give a damn that they're blood tears. She seems shocked by my face and said. "Do all killers cry red tears?" I nod solemnly. "There's no hope for me, Hikari" I said to her. "No hope at all." She shook her head. "There is hope" she replied. "You just have to find it" I looked at her and gazed deeply into her eyes. I saw everything, she was telling the truth. She was innocent, purely, untouched. Just like I used to be.

Then, I realized something. Fate had brought us together. It had tried to show me that there was hope for me, it just depended if I would take it or not. But I couldn't, wouldn't. I've gone too far to turn back now. "I'm sorry, Hikari" I say. "But it's too late for me. She refuses to believe me. "No, it's not" she replied. "But it's so close to too late for me" 

I look at her and smiled. "Vice versa" I say to her. "You're still innocent, pure. I'm not. I'm dirty, worthless" She seems confused by my words and I say it simpler, "You're still good. I'm evil." Then, as if the gods had willed it, I kissed her. I had claimed her innocent lips as my own. She had gasped but leaned into it and kissed be back.

When I pulled away, I gasped at the mark I left on her. It glowed on her forehead for a while then disappeared. "The Sennen Eye" I whispered. "The god of RA is within you. My powers are yours." She was confused but then nodded. "I understand," she said. "You have to go. But you're always with me. Not in body but in spirit"

I couldn't have said it better myself. I nodded and replied, "If he tries hurts you, just call my name. If he even lays a finger on you, you can defeat him" and then I disappeared.

I looked at my surroundings. The shadows are angry I had spared a light. They hate the light. But I shrug them off. They haven't tried to kill me yet, so it's no big deal. She DESERVED to be saved, she didn't deserve to come down here, just as I had. She didn't deserve to be a killer.

I am Yuugi Muhto. I have bypassed fate more than once and I will ever do so again. I may kill countless thousands but I will never tarnish one that could me more in life than I ever could be. I am a shadow, but I won't refuse to help the light. For I can only sit back and watch ruefully; as my children become everything I am not. 

I've done this final task so leave me alone. I'm no longer human, no longer alive, and once more, I will care for no one. I don't love, hate, or even feel. I will never return to the light, and you'll never see me, forever more.

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okiz.….…...@_@. I'm evil no? Well, ok yeah, I am. NEwayz, this is the ONLY time you'll see Yuugi act so, like the person he should be. He's lost to the darkness forever, nothing will ever claim him back. I hope you enjoyed seeing a small light in him because it will never be reawakened again. Thank you. *bows*

Oh BTW R/R. Tell me if ya Hate it or Love it. But only I can Kill it. (inside joke, very bad, I know)

Buh Bye!! ^_^

s.S (aka sTaR SNipEr)


	6. Pain

Quiet. Tranquil. Blood. Not too sour but yet, it wasn't all that sweet either. I don't take much of it. It'll get me sick later. I spit at my victim's face. "Serves you right" I say. "But you're dead now, so, why am I talking to you anyway?" I shrug and burn all evidence there is that this was murder. But they'll know. They'll know it was me.

I hear a clapping behind me. I almost jump in surprise but then I sense who it is. "Haha, very funny Otogi" I say. I hear a gasp behind me but I know he's faking it. "How EVER di you know it was me? My my, little Yuugi, you're getting better at this everyday." He says in a sort of mocking tone.

"Shut the fuck up" I reply harshly back to him. He laughs. "Now...that's not the Yuugi I know that has the title as Game King." This time, I burst out laughing. It's funny, I guess. "Otogi Otogi Otogi" I say chuckling this time. "The Yuugi you saw before was a naïve little creature. He was just a child hiding behind a mask"

Then, I feel his arms wrap around me. I let him do that. He's protective of me. Like an older brother of some sort. Just like Abbie is to me. Sometimes I wonder, why does everyone want to protect me, or hold me close? What is it that just sets them off that I have to be protected anyway?!?! I'm not a little kid!

"I can answer that for you" I hear him say. _Damnit Otogi, stop reading my mind ya damn bastard_ I laugh mentally. I hear him pretend gasp in shock. _Well_ he replies. _VERY colorful language Yuugi-boy. Very indeed_. I grimace at the nickname and roll my eyes. _You NEED to get away from Pegasus_ I reply. _Seriously_.

He laughs and just hugs me tighter. _Yuugi, in my head, you're still that boy you claim to have abandoned long ago. You're still my little one_. Really? _Is that why you treat me like that? Or is there something else?_ I press further at him _Tell me Otogi or I'll force it out of you_.

He laughs again but then he face turns serious. He sighs and runs his hand along my cheek. _You're beautiful Yuugi, did you know that?_ He asks me. _So I've heard_ I reply. _What's that got to do with anything? _I ask Damnit_, _I swear I will kill that laugh of his one day. And I know exactly how to. _Tell me Otogi or you know what I'll do_ I tell him angrily holding up one of my knives to show I wasn't kidding

_OK Ok Mr. Impatient_ he replies. _Look, it's like this Yuugi. You hold purity none of us ever held. You were innocent once and you can change back if you want to be but the rest of us can't. We were stripped of our childhood, stripped of everything and anything that could make us happy. But you, you weren't. Yes, you led a childhood we all led but you turned out different. You didn't turn the darkness like we did. You pushed it away and put hope there instead._

I'm shocked by his choice of wording but he still had more. _You may not see it, but frankly, we fear you. Fear you because you can change everything for us. You can make us turn away form the darkness, make us something else. But what good is the light without the darkness?_ I nod agreeing with him. _Everyday, the light grows brighter but the shadow goes deeper_ I say to him _Exactly_ he replies.

_Yuugi_ he says. _You can go back, you can become that light again. For us, we never held that light in the first place. But you could do it, you're more powerful that the Council itself and I'll be damned if they didn't already know that. And when you came here, you were broken and scared and we thought we could change you, and we'd have a power to our side and we did. But not completely. You've still got hope; you can still turn back no matter how far you've fallen into this hole. We can't hold you back, we can't kill you, you know too much already._

I nod and just melt into his arms. _Otogi, I know that, but I've made my decision, I'm staying here. The hurt is just too large to start over with again. Besides, I'm halfway done with my mission, I'm not backing out now_. I say to him quietly. He nuzzles my neck. _Funny how we're not supposed to feel any closeness to another being but look at us now_ he says to me. I laugh.

_THIS_ I reply. _Has no emotion. It's an instinct._ I roll my eyes and he smiles. _You're right_ he replies. _I DON"T feel any emotion in this, just a sort of possessiveness. You're mine Yuugi Muhto, MY dark angel and don't you ever forget that. _I laugh. _That's just what Abbie says to me_ I reply. _Then she has good reason to do so_. Otogi says. _The darkness has claimed you, but she and I claim your very soul my little one_.

I nod and feel his arms leave my body. He's gone now. Gone, just like the rest of them. That was his good-bye message to me. I know it. Seto's gone; Abbie's gone, now Otogi gone.  I HAVE to be alone and it's so damn bitter being like that. I trained Seto, even if it was for a short time. Abbie trained me, and Otogi offered me company. And god-Damnit they're gone. They can't be with me anymore, because if I let anyone get close to me, I'll only put them in danger.

But Otogi was right. I CAN change them. But I won't. It was their choice to be a shadow, just as much as it were mine. I just wish it didn't have to be such a lonely job, especially when I make THE mission. This is my biggest one, the one where I destroy my old life completely and make a new one in the dark. I sort of regret doing this because I have to do it alone and I knowing that when I'm finished, I'll be all-alone again. Abbie says it's not that bad. Otogi says it brings a sort of peace. Seto, I wouldn't know yet. But I bet he'll hate it just as much as I do.

I'm bored now. Let's see, Anzu's dead, so is Jou, and Honda, who do I have left? Seto's one of us now, Mokuba's dead, that leaves Isis, Malik, Bakura, and Ryou. Oh yeah, Yami too. Hmm...I'm too lazy to kill the psychopaths and I don't know where in hell Isis is so I'll go torture Yami. I don't want to kill him until ALL the rest of them are dead. Then he'll know the pain of being alone, of feeling betrayed. Than and ONLY then will I kill him off. I want him to suffer for what he did to me, I want him to want to die, I want him dead.

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I'm here. It's lonely just looking at it. I sigh and concentrate. Almost immediately, I'm there. I'm in Yami's room. Argh, it smells like shit in here. Has he been vomiting or sumthin? I can't stand it, it's horrible. Then I sense it. It's Yami; he's in the bathroom. I take a look in and see him staring at the mirror. Good God!!! He doesn't even look like a person anymore.

My curiosity overwhelms me so I decide to take a look into his mind. Well, I'm shocked. It's a jumble. He's gone insane, literally. He can't distinct reality from fantasy anymore. He's lost all those that he cared about, and well…that's all I need to know. He's going to commit suicide. There is NO way I'm letting him do that. _I'm_ going to kill him god-Damnit. Besides, I want him to suffer more. And I know just how.

"Taking the easy way out?" I sneer right behind him. He drops the razor I his hand immediately and looks at me shocked. "H-how-di-did-you?" he stuttered and then I almost wanted to throw up when I saw his face. He was a ghost of a person, starved, and he had been vomiting endlessly everywhere. I make a face of disgust. "Your pathetic. I repeat PA-THE-TIC," I said exaggerating each syllable. Then, he does the unexpected. He runs over to me and cries on my shoulder.

Ok, that's it, NOW I'm going to kill him. He's crying on me like a scared child. "Damnit Yami, get the fuck off me" I say coldly and push him onto the floor. He's obviously shocked by my actions but gets up and hugs me close, stroking my hair. Okay, that's annoying now. He's hugging me like I was still his _aibou_. "Yami, I said get of me or I will slit your throat," I say holding up a knife. I'm ready to plunge it right into him when he kisses me. A real kiss.

It's not a kiss of lust, not desire, not anything but..._love. _Whoa, wait a second, love? Ugh...I push him away from me and spit in his face. "What the fuck you bastard!?!?!" I scream out at him "what makes you think you can fucking go up to me, and fucking cry on my fucking shirt then fucking kiss me?!!?!" Then I hear a laugh behind me. Oh for god's sake, why is HE here?  
"Colorful language Yuugi-boy. Very colorful" It was Otogi. I growl at him. "What the hell do you want Otogi?" I say between gritted teeth. Yami looks confused than I realize he hasn't even come out of hiding. "Damnit Otogi get the hell out here before I fucking shove my knife up your fucking ass!!" I scream. "All right all right" Otogi replies and almost instantly appears out of the floor, just as I had. "There happy?" he said rolling his eyes while Yami fell back to the floor in shock.

I nod and just for the sake of it, I grab him and kiss him desirably. When I break of out kiss, he's shocked. He's staring at me like he doesn't know me anymore. I smirk. "I thought you left," I say coolly. He shakes his head. "None of us _ever_ left Yuugi" he replied. "We're still watching you, and we're not going to leave you" he added .I'm in shock. "But won't the council..." "The council can go to fucking hell" Otogi replied. I sighed. 

"Why are you here?" I ask him. "I'm here" he started. _Because I want to see you do it_ he says in my head. I growl _Damnit Otogi, go fuck off somewhere else I'm just torturing him, I'm not killing him YET. I still have got others to kill after this._ I snarl back at him. He glares but then shrugs. "Suit yourself yami Tenshi" he said to me and vanished form where he came from. I growl _Damn you Otogi, I told you not to call me that_ I say to him and I know he can hear me. He laughs. _And you're so damn cute when you're angry_ he replies back to me before cutting off. I swear, I WILL kill him one day.

My gaze then turns to Yami who's staring at me, shocked. "What the hell are you lookin at?" I snarl at him and he flinches. Finally, he gathers up the courage to look at me and says. "Yuugi, what happened to you?" I try my best to suppress my anger. "IT"S NONE OF YOUR BUISNESSS!!!!!" I suddenly scream out and throw my knife at the wall. It hits his right shoulder and he screamed in pain. I look at him and smirk. "You're not dying don't worry" I say licking my lips. I eventually walk over to him and pull my knife out forcefully. He cried out in agony but then the wound immediately closes up. I smirk. "You're lucky" I say to him moving closer. "But not lucky enough" I say and sink my teeth into his neck. The screams of agony are drowned as I engulf his blood.

I am Yuugi Muhto. Never underestimate my fury. I won't be able to rest till my revenge is done and my past will haunt me no more. Half my friends are dad I only have half more to go. I will never return to the light no matter how much it coaxes me. I court with death each passing day, it woes and flirts with me but has not claimed me yet. I die a little each day, my soul is gone and my heart is ice. Those I seek as companions will leave my side soon, Otogi, Abbie, and Seto, no matter what they say, in the end, I'll always be alone.

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Well, that was um...yeah. I realized that I had forgotten about Otogi while writing this so I made him one of my slayers. Yes, I like calling them slayers. Thing is, Otogi has a bit of an infatuation with Yuugi, and Yuugi knows that. He doesn't let him get to close, for fear not of rape, but for emotion breaking through his shield. The slayers are not permitted to love, or even feel. They're supposed to be alone at any given time. Or that, that's the way it's supposed to be. Remember, Yuugi's different and he attracts attention everywhere. Otogi was right, he COULD lead them all away form this life they're leading now but why would he? He seeks to put no more good in the world and just kills, emotionless, just like all the rest of them. And that will forever be his fate.

Anywayz, R/R!!! I hope this is good

s.S (aka sTaR SNipEr)


	7. Twisted Passion

**Sighs** Well, I've been busy these past few weeks. Damn! I have so much schoolwork and tests coming up plus I've got a science Day thing…. god!!! **Breaths heavily** Ok, I got that out of mah system, that's good ^_^ NEwayz, for anyone who's wondering bout how close Otogi and Yuugi are, take a look-see.

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The shadows are screaming, the darkness wills to drive me insane. They scream high-pitched screams, loud enough to break the eardrums of a normal human being. But then again, I'm not human now am I?

I add my own scream to the darkness, a scream so high pitched those alive could not hear it, but the dead and the shadows were crying out in pain at the sound. That's what I live for, the cries of agony, of pain and terror. They're the only comfort for me and I know my scream is the worst.

Silence. They're gone, all of them. Good, I wanted to be left alone. I take a deep breath and a tear rolls down my cheek. It drops, falling into the shadows where it can never be reclaimed again. It's part of the darkness now, and forever lost.

A small chuckle erupts suddenly all around me. I go into a defense position, ready to attack whoever dares threaten me. But then I realize whose it is and I growl. "Coward!!!" I scream to the darkness. "Why are you even here? Show yourself Otogi!!!"

A laugh escapes before I see him. It was only for a brief second then he disappears again. I growl in resent. I do not have time for his mind games. "Bastard" I mutter under my breath and a small gasp echoes off the walls. "My my Yuugi" comes Otogi's haunting voice. "Such vulgar language" he laughs and appears again then disappears.

"OTOGI!!!!!" I scream out. "Show yourself before I really DO hurt you!!!" a small tap on my back makes me jump but I turn around and growl at who it is. He's hanging there, in midair, upside down. "Otogi, you bastard" I snarl at him. Then I take a deep breath and sigh. "What the hell do you want?" I say coldly. He laughs. "Yuugi, I just want your company" he says then suddenly disappears and reappears behind me. "Boo!" he says and smacks my ass. I jump and try to smack him back but he pulls me into a passionate kiss.

_Damn you Otogi, Damn you_ I say to him mentally. Although I do enjoy this, I really don't have time for our 'games' as we call it. _Damn sexually deprived Otogi_ I snarl at him He chuckled mentally. _Now now Yuugi, you're the same are you not?_ He asked tauntingly and breaks off out kiss. I smirk. "You wanna 'play'?" I ask him. I roll my eyes. "Fine"

He grins like a Cheshire cat. He takes me into his arms again and kisses me deeply. I suck lightly on his bottom lip and he moans. When we break off I say, "You like that?" He nods. "I want more" he says evilly and tackles me down. 

I only know so well what to do. We caress each other; embrace the darkness and its companionship. My hands roam his body. I know every curve and twist in it. I know where his weaknesses lie; something can be all too useful to me at times.

Of course, he knows the same about me. But it's not that easy. We can't make love; we're dead and empty. I wasn't kidding. We threw away our lives, and our souls can rot in hell. We are immune to sickness, natural death, and any other means by which mortal beings can die.

But we aren't indestructible. We can break; we're so fragile right now we can break. But we don't let anyone know that. We let nothing stand in the way of what we strive for; to rid the world of light and let the darkness forever rule.

Sometimes, I think that the mortals are doing our work for us. Look at it, our world, corrupted by hunger and greed. Destruction everywhere and bombs of all sorts made secretly unknown to the world.

But we know this one thing. The world will become a toxic waste. Everything that the mortals did to prolong life, which I am surprised that they have accomplished, will die out eventually. And when it does, we will take over and a new reign shall come. Our reign. The reign of darkness.

But we won't let corrupt and greed forsake us. We know all to well by observing and killing the humans at will. We know many things form our observations, and here is what we know: Emotions are weak, the bring nothing BUT pain. Blood of the innocent cannot be touched, for we could taint it's perfectly good taste, therefore making it sour and vile. 

Rape is one-sided pleasure, something which we will only do to those who deserve it. Slavery is something not forced, but given willingly. Sharp objects such as knives and swords can be our best allies. Weapons and bombs are useless, we cannot die. Disease comes only to the weak, those who have not the ability to fight back. Modern traveling needs we need not, for we can travel through the dimensions of space and time.

So many observations, so little time to copy them down. We store them in the back of our memories, and only prolong them when needed. Ah well.

My bond to Otogi is not strong, it's just passion built on desire and loneliness. I am surprised that it has not collapsed yet. Love does not exist, you only think you are in love when you get this gagging feeling in your stomach. Another observation. I thought I loved people, but they never _truly_ cared for me, nobody has. All it is infatuation and hard cold desire.

After for what seemed quite a while, we collapsed, our bodies entwined as if they were one. He has his arms around my waist, and our legs criss-cross together.. My fingers are running through his each, and he's gently nipping at my ear. We are not bare, but our clothing has been tore down and hands loosely, leaving nothing unexposed to the eye.

He smirks and runs his hand along my cheek. I purr slightly then pull away. He runs a trail of kisses down my neck. It's the same game. The same words and actions. We've played it for so long, shamelessly and boldly. He can be all I need, all I want. He drew me into this, gave it all to me. He gave me the blood I hungered he brought me here to this place. He got Abbie to train me, he taught me to close my wounds and every other venerable spot in me completely. He offered me this; this twisted way of living and I took it. Took it because I knew him, knew what he was. I knew he was the shadow that wanted to drag me into the night; the object that wanted me to be part of him. I know of his infatuation with me, I know about his obsessions. I don't' give a damn.

Abandoned, Lonely, and Depressed, he used against me. He took me in my weakest stage and carried me off to this living hell. He brought me into his life, made me what he was. He made me a shadow, a lone figure in the dark. He twisted and turned my so-called innocent figure and made it into highly dangerous and organized killer

_What's going on in that little head of your little Yuugi?_ Came Otogi's haunting voice. I growl _Nothing that concerns you_ I reply. Then I pull him into a heated kiss. _Just give me what I want_ I say to him mentally. We don't need words. We hardly communicate and some people think it's so scary that we don't utter a word. Even when I use my own voice, it's something foreign to me.

Eventually, we break off. We're both panting for breath. Our breathing pattern is even the same. I look over at him and smirk. _Same game_ I say. He nods and smirks as well. _Always. And forever will be. Mine._ I know what he means. _Possession, Obsession. That's all I am to you. Fire, Desire, that's what you are to me.  Our relation, is simple. I belong to you and you belong to me._ I reply to him 

He smirks. _Mine forever, my one and only. I'll keep you forever and clip your wings._ He says. It's our song, my song his song. So I sing the next note. _Running like fire, blowing like wind. Flowing like water, my blood into your veins. You've twisted and bent me, stripped me all I had. You made me a demon, but my side, you did not leave. _It's a simple song really. We've sung it to each other over and over again, numerous times. So then...why does it feel like I've never heard it before? I shake it off and listen as he says his part of the song now.

_Your breath is pure passion, your body a maze. Your lips are an elixir, that I cannot wait to taste. Such a small young thing, so innocent so pure. Too bad, you're mine now, my small, petite angel. _I remember it now. When he first took me into his room. What he tasted like. What he smelled like. He held a scent on endless murder and blood spill, he still does but now it's stronger to me than before. I used to be disgusted with it, but now, I've acquired that scent as well. He tasted like ginger, quite spicy and hot. I remember the cold feel of his tongue along my stripped body. Oh no, he didn't make love to me, he couldn't. But god damn it was fucking close to it.

_Hate me, Love me, Kill me_ we said in unison. _You've stolen my last breath. Hate me, Love me, Kill me. Took away my pain. Hate me, Love me, Kill me. Don't you dare go away. Hate me, Love me, Kill me. Because I desperately need you touch_. I've never said those words so strongly in my entire life.

It's there. I need him, want him, I've grown dependant on his touch. I hate it, I love it, I can't kill it.

These thoughts echo freely through my head. I don't care if he can hear me. But I know he can. _Shh...little one. Don't wander on these pointless things. They mean nothing and will only lead to your destruction_. Those words, he's said them to me before. Oh yeah, I remember. When he first introduced me to the order. I was a naïve little thing back then, I don't think you even recognize me now, do you?

I thought so. I'm empty now, void of everything in this world. But no matter how hard I try, I still cling on to that fear...fear of emotion. I've come so close to it millions of times. Most of my victims, I've actually showed something of emotion. But, nothing like I did to Hikari. I poured my soul to her, shared her pain, gave her the last of my own mortal powers. Hikari...it means _light_. She is light. She's beautiful...a small petite angel. An angel that, if she had been a few years older, would have stolen my heart had I not become what I am.

Otogi senses my feelings then he whispers, "You have the power to do it. Go on. Bring her over" My eyes widen as I recognize what he means. I pull away from him and strike him across the face. "Never" I say venom dripping in my tone. "Don't you dare Otogi, she hasn't done _anything_"

He laughs then nurses the spot where I hit him. _You poor nave child_ he says to me mentally. _You worst fears are coming true, you're showing emotion. _Then I realize he's right. I am. I'm protecting her. What made me fall so close to her? _Probably because you killed her mother. _Otogi said. I growled. I did NOT want to be reminded of that. _Whatever_ I reply back to him.

He takes me into his arms again. _You know I wouldn't do that anyway_ he whispers. I look at him. _Yes, I do. You'd be jealous someone else would be getting my attention besides you. You're already envious of Abbie and Seto, Hikari would just add to that wouldn't she?_ I snap back at him. He laughs. _She's already claimed your attention, and yes, I am envious of her. You're mine Yuugi Muhto, only mine_ he says and runs a trail of kisses down my neck. I moan just to satisfy him.

_Yes_ I reply. _Yours. Yours forever._

I am Yuugi Muhto, the assassin, the killer. Call me what you want but there is no way you can break me. Few know my secrets; many have tales about me, but all those are sugarcoated to hide who I really am. I am a shadow, a fiery passion. I need not to love, or even feel anything. I just watch the world pass me by, as my body and soul drift away into endless night.

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Okiz...one thing, if you've read mah bio, mah online name that I go by is Hikari or Kari. NO, I am not the little eight-year-old girl in mah own story, mah real name's not even Hikari. Or Kari for that matter, it's not even close. Buh that's the name I go by so there!! **sticks her tongue out at the readers** One day, I actually will reveal mah real name and a few individuals actually know it, but I don't need a stalker thank you very much. ^_^

NEwayz, R/R

Buh Bye!! ^_^

s.S (aka sTaR SNipEr)


	8. Gaara, the killer who loves only himself

 I FINALY UPDATED!!!!!!! YaY!! I'm soooo sorry to anyone who's been waiting for this patiently. I've just been so busy these past few weeks. So many tests!!!! @. @

Well NEwayz, this story's going to be over soon. I intended to make it longer but alas, my love for YGO has waned in the past few months. I'm no longer obsessed with it, nor do I even remotely like the show at all. I still read the Manga cause I think it's quite interesting (Shonen Jump) but other than that, by the end of summer, all my connections to this particular anime will be cut off. I will no longer write YGO fan fiction after I finish this. T.T

I'm so sorry! Really I am. But the YGO community is getting to big and I feel a bit overcrowded. I'm obsessed w9th new animes like Naruto, Shaman King, Evangelon, Chobits, Ranma ½, and such. Really, I'm sorry, I guess as I look back on the old YGO eps. I think, "Why did I like this show in the first place?"

NEwayz, I'm sorry to anyone I'm disappointing. But onto a different topic, here's the next chapter of Hate Me, Love Me, Kill Me

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I wake up the next morning, by myself. Damn Otogi. Leaving me. Again. He's always left me, one moment, he's holding me like he'll never let me go, the next, I'm all by myself while Otogi goes off to...who knows where.

I shrug. Might as well go off and finish my mission. Who do I have left to kill around here? Ah yes. Bakura, Ryou, Mali, Marik, and I shudder Yami. No, I'm killing him later. He doesn't deserve to die yet. I want him to feel the pain. The pain I felt when they all abandoned me. Oh yeah, sure that bitch Anzu was controlling them somehow with that damn Millennium Rod but do I look like I care? No, I don't. I'm killing you all one by one. 

I guess you're wondering why I did this even though I know they all probably didn't mean to hurt me on their own free will right? Well, here's some backup for all the bakas out there. It hurt. That's the only thing. It hurt me deeply and when or IF she'd taken off that spell, they'd at least try to find me. But no. They didn't. I was left here all alone in the cold until Otogi found me.

I guess I should go and kill my next victims, or _victim_ to be more specific. The council wants Bakura, Malik and Marik on their side. They think they'll be powerful allies to us. I don't doubt them but I don't think they'll take it too lightly that they have to follow orders from some people they've never seen before. I shrug. If they refuse, there's no compromising, we just kill them. Simple as that.

It's cruel isn't it? Well, grow up; the world isn't what it's supposed to be. There's war everywhere. Everyday, soldiers die for some unknown reason or some go missing. Funny thing is, when one disappears, others are traumatized. I sigh. That didn't happen with me. Nobody missed _the weakling_. Nobody missed Yuugi Muhto!!

My anger explodes all around as things shake and some break into tiny pieces. My eyes have gone a bright crimson red by now I think. When I let my anger loose, that's what I do. Everything near me either dies or gets destroyed.  The mirror next to me cracks and I look at my own reflection. I gasp and my anger wavers then completely disappears. I collapse onto the floor.

What have I become? I'm a killer, a cold-hearted killer who'll kill a thousand people and yet hurt ten times that amount. They probably did miss me, but after looking for a few months, they assumed I was dead, thanks to that bitch Anzu's influence.

And I had killed them. Not all of them, but most of them to date. There were only a few left after my massacre. But I was just using the excuse that they betrayed me to hide behind. I wanted to prove to them I was strong. I wanted to prove to them I wasn't weak. I wanted to prove that I was _human_. And I became a coldhearted blood killer to do it.

I sigh and get up. I just showed emotion. I just showed weakness. I really need to eliminate them soon. Before, I change my mind. Before I decide to turn back. I shake my head and bury it in my knees. I can't turn back the hands of time. I can't repent for what I've done. I've killed countless people for what? For money, for an organization, for sport! To subdue my own pain, I inflicted it upon others.

I guess, deep inside, I'm still me. Still the innocent, naive child I was before. Oh well. I close my eyes and once again the familiar rush of my body being taken to a different place surrounds me. My eyes open to reveal my location. The Bakura household. This is it. Now or never.

I close my eyes again and instantly I'm in their living room. There they are. Ryou, Malik, Bakura, and Malik. Oh look. There's Ryou. Doesn't he feel a bit left out? Almost snort. Of course she should, he never really belonged with them in the first place. Then, there's his shyness and the trio over there ignoring him probably doesn't help either.

Quickly, I make my way around the room and behind him. Suddenly, his throat is against my knife. He gasps. Malik, Marik and Bakura look up in horror and shock. Bakura growls. "Show yourself, human or are you too cowardly to do so?" he says coldly at me. I chuckle at his petty attempt to scare me. "Now now Bakura" I reply stepping out of my hiding place. "Would you really hurt an old friend?" I ask smirking. They all gasp. I guess they recognized me.

"Surprised?" I asked amused. I move closer to Ryou and sniff his hair. Mmm...Exotic shampoo. Not bad. "Hey Ryou, how have you been?" I ask casually. He's too frightened to answer. "I...I..." he stutters then gulps looking down at my dagger which is getting closer to his throat. I hear Bakura growl again. "Put him down, Pharaoh's boy" I hear Malik say. "He hasn't done anything yo you," he adds coldly. I chuckle. "Do I look like a pharaoh's boy Malik?" I ask and turn to him. I also press the knife closer to Ryou's throat, almost, but not completely drawing blood. 

"So pretty" I say leaning closer to him. "Shame to kill someone like you" I add and lightly nip at his ear. He shivers.               

Suddenly, they all start to close in on me, leaving no apparent way out. Not like I need it, I have my own ways. But I sigh and stare deeply into his frightened eyes with sympathy. Somewhere, in there, was someone I knew, but I didn't know if he saw the old me in there. Maybe I was too far away. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered into his ear. Those were the last words he heard. I had slit his throat and killed him. "NO!!!!" Bakura had cried out and lunged at me. I merely closed me eyes and disappeared into the shadows. When I reappeared, I was upstairs, and they couldn't find me. I sighed at looked sat the bleeding form before me. I laid him down on the floor, closing his deathly eyes, not being able to stare into them. But then I saw something. He was still alive. What?  I couldn't feel his heart beat. HE was dead wasn't he? But then, that look in his eyes…

No. No no no no no. It was pity. Damnit!! I slapped his face. It was only then that his eyes clouded with death. He didn't give 'that look' anymore which relieved me. But then, back to what I started, I bent over and broke his neck, preventing him form ever being able to come alive again. Then, I lowered my head and drank form the slit in his throat.

His blood was sweet. Like sugar. Like something I could never get off of. Like a drug. Like something worse. Then I heard screams and footsteps coming up the stairs. I knew they'd found me. Bakura looked at me in horror as a got up, blood still dripping form my lips.

"You...you monster" he spat out at me though I could tell he was afraid. I nodded. "I am a monster aren't I? I've killed so many; just to soothe my own pain. I gave other people pain to take away my own. But you know what, it didn't help. I'm still alone. And cold and lonely" I replied.

They all stared at me in shock. I nodded. "Now!" I cried out and then all the shadows from the walls and floors came out suddenly and grabbed them. IT was the perfect timing. That was their most vulnerable point. Either way, they're becoming one of us, or they will _die_. 

Otogi appeared next to me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. _Good job._ He told me mentally. I nodded _What if they refuse?_ I asked but I already knew the answer. Otogi laughed. _They will die, and if you want, the council will let you kill them. _I nodded. _Take me back, I've had a bad day_ I said then fell into his arms. I felt him carry me through the dimensions and lay me down on they bed we'd shared the night before. Then, he laid down right next to me and wrapped his arms around me.

For some reason, it felt right to me. I don't know why, even up to this day, I don't know.

I am Yuugi Muhto, _Gaara_ the killer who loves only himself. I'm a shadow in darkness, forever hiding, forever waiting for my salvation. But I know it will never come. My only salvation is to die but who accept me? I am someone worse than the devil and too tainted to be with God. I have taken too many lives to count and I do not beg forgiveness upon them. Amen, I say to you, I am no one; you'll never know my name, for you'll die before you whisper it out loud.

Hate Me, Love me, Kill me

Don't you forget it. Because, I will never die, I will live until the end of time. And the only thing you'll see…

Is my sorrowing face in the deepest, blackest night

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Request please, I'm trying to get to atleast 100 reviews before I quit as a YGO writer. Can you please do that for me before I move on to other animes to write about? I would be really happy if you did that for me. *sighs* I'm being so dramatic aren't I? My friends are right when they call me a drama queen. *laughs* Ah well, maybe I will write a few YGO fics. Probably al one shot since I won't have the inspiration to continue them. *sob sob* Oh well. I'll save my good bye paragraph for the last chapter of this story

s.S                                                                     


	9. Death All Around Me, Children Laughing, ...

DISCLAIMER: I DUN OWN YU-GI-OH SO IF YOU WANT TO SUE ME, FORGET IT!!!

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Alrighte, I FINALLY updated! ^____________________^ Yay! *dances around happily* It took me forever to get this chapter written down, and it was SO hard too. I'd forgotten what most of the plot was so I had to RE-READ my own story! I made this chapter extra long so no one would kill me plus I had a lot to say lol! I wrote a lot of things a little OOC, well to me they were OOC, maybe you all can't tell the difference ^_^

Ah well, enjoy!

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I woke up on complete blackness. Otogi next to me. I yawned then sighed. Another day of hell. 

Sometimes, I wondered why I was alive, or why I was even born. I didn't have anything special about me; even though I freed Yami from the puzzle but what good did it bring me? It turned me into...this. A killer, a shadow, something that's neither alive nor dead. Something that can die so easily but is indestructible by human means. I don't know who I am or what I am anymore.

Malik and Bakura's trials are today. I have to go and see. I am the one who brought them in after all. _Morning_ Otogi greeted nipping at my ear. I sighed and tilted my head back allowing him more access to my neck. I could feel every painful bite and I knew there were already enough scars there but I didn't seem to care. I wasn't alive nor was I dead. All I knew was that I belonged to one person.

And that person had been sleeping next to me just moments before.

His kisses are like a poison, dangerous yet intoxicating, and I always feel weak when he touches me. He bites at my skin like a rabid animal turning it raw and red then kisses it lightly to take away the pain. His hands know every curve and twist in my body; I can hide nothing from him, not even in my mind. His dark green eyes are like precious gems, full of hatred of the world and off anything but they change to lust and hungriness when he sees me, and only me. He claims authority over me; he is envious of anyone who dares try to get close to me. 

He's a part of me, my owner, my lover my everything. I'll always belong to him, from now until the end of time.

"I have to go to their trial today" I whispered breathlessly as he found a most forbidding part of me. The rest of what happened was a blur, and why wouldn't it be. Before I knew it, he'd disappeared and left me, stripped down to almost nothing, bright red scratches and bruises left on my skin. I watched dully as they quickly healed, my skin becoming snow white and pure again, as it always had been. Nothing could kill me, nothing could hurt me, even if I was tortured for a thousands years, my skin would show no scar. Only my soul would. Then again, no one can ever see those scars can they?

~*~

It wasn't long before I found myself at the trials. Abbie and Seto were there, as well as thee council and Malik, Marik and Bakura. I smirked. "Well," I said walking up to a chained up Bakura with bruises all over his skin and his hair a complete rat's nest. Obviously, he'd been fighting since he'd been captured, and was not ready to give up. "Give up Bakura." I snarled. "There's no escape from here on out."

Bakura's eyes opened slowly as recognition along with hate and cold fury came across his face. "BASTERD!!!!" he cried out forgetting that he was chained up as he prepared to attack me. I smirked as hot, salty tears rolled down his cheeks. "Pathetic" I said shaking my head in disappointment. "You let your emotions rule over you; you've actually let yourself become attached to your little hikari now didn't you? It must've been painful to see him die like that but what about all the other deaths you've caused, huh Bakura-chan? In the past? I know, you've killed but you never thought you'd let someone become close to you only to watch them die huh? Guess you know what those close to the ones you killed feel now"

"SHUT UP!!!!!!" Bakura cried out in a rage. He somehow managed to break free of all in bonds in his anger and lunged out to attack me. My eyes widened the slightest bit. He was strong. I could just disappear into the shadows if I wanted to. But I wanted to test his strength. I closed my eyes and braced myself for the attack my hand on my knife. It didn't matter if he died. All three of them were expendable anyway. 

The blow never came. I opened my eyes and saw Otogi in front his me, his hands stopping Bakura from even touching me. He glared then slapped him so hard he fell to the ground. Bakura gasped at what had happened and brought a shocked hand to his face. "Don't you fucking dare touch what is mine" Otogi growled then kicked Bakura's gut. "You're lucky to even be alive, you worthless piece of shit." Heh. That was Otogi. But, he's wrong. He's not lucky to be alive. No one in this order is. And once you've entered it; it's a hell lot worse than being dead. Death is the easy way out, when you die, you're at piece. But here, you live with an agony and the knives of hell constantly going through your skin and puncturing the depths of your soul.

Malik and Marik just watched in horror as Otogi took out a knife and prepared to kill him. The council didn't even bother to stop him. I hissed. _Don't kill him, I want to_ I told him telepathically. He turned around and I glared at him. Otogi shrugged, obviously not caring. _Fine by me_ he answered. I smirked. "You know" I said out loud walking up to the bruised Tomb Robber. "Otogi wasn't exactly right when he said you were lucky to be alive." 

I lifted up his chin to see his angered face, blood dripping form his lips. He breathed hard; he was too exhausted to fight back. "Kill me" he said. "Go ahead, you've killed so many before how is this any different pharaoh's boy?" he said and smirked. My eyes widened in fury as I slapped him hard across the face. "Don't call me that" I said angrily, my temper rising. He laughed. "You think I don't know, Yuugi. Of course, everyone knew what you Yami had done to you. And he was in agony for weeks, it was actually funny. Deep inside, no matter how much hate you harbor, you won't be able to kill him. Because...he's a part of you damnit, you don't kill the other half of you. Just like I couldn't kill Ryou." His eyes suddenly flashed sadness and it surprised me but I quickly hid it.

"Tch" I said. "I'll kill him; I killed everybody else didn't I?" I said laughing insanely. "I even killed you precious light ha! You must hate me now don't you" Bakura shook his head. "Nah...It's different actually. I actually feel sorry for you, you little basterd" he said laughing. That was it. Pity? Again?! Right then and there I hated him to no end. I pulled out my knife and before I knew what I was doing, I struck him. Not one, not twice, but so many times I couldn't count. Once again, I had carelessly let my emotions control me as I struck him again and again and Otogi had to stop me.

"He's dead" he said kissing me softly and taking the knife away from my hands and placing it next to Bakura. "Heh" he said his eyes starting to roll up into his head. "If you really, truly hated him, he would've been the first person...to...d....ie..." and then he was gone. I growled and turned away from the corpse. "Fucking basterd" I said then relaxed as I felt Otogi's hungry kisses on me again. I moaned and threw my head back, my neck inviting him to kiss my pain away. 

It didn't last long. After a while, we pulled apart as I gazed upon the two left. Malik and Marik. Malik had been unchained by Kaiba, who he now clung desperately to while Marik had broken free from his bonds to rush to his lover. He sighed. "He was right, if you really had hated Yami with everything you hate, you'd have killed him first. I feel sorry for you, really I do. You've shown your true colors but you're still hiding. Hiding behind the curtain of despair." And then he took the knife from Bakura's side and killed himself as well. I looked away, but it didn't bother me. 

They both deserved to die. NO ONE pities me and lives. I'm not hiding, they're wrong. WRONG. I do hate Yami, but when he dies I won't even have my hate anymore. Yami, I'll kill, you, I'll never forgive you, you hear me? It's too late for apologies; look at what I have become. Truly, you must be upset. Now, I'm exactly like you. Or rather, the opposite. You've forgotten in this modern world full of forgiveness and goodwill what it's like to feel death and punishment all around you. What it's like to feel pain. That's what went through for a while. Now I'm awake, and I intend to show you who I really am. Before was just a taste and if you're terrified now, you'll just _love_ the rest of me.

Malik's eyes widened then he lowered his head in obvious sorrow. Kaiba whispered for him not be so, and lifted his head up so that they faced each other. "From now on, this place is hell. This is where the lost and broken souls of the world come to gather. We live to kill and to feed ourselves. We kill others because that is the one thing that makes us fee alive. We are worse than dead, we are immortal neither human disease nor weapon can kill us. Like me, you will be taught everything we abide by to survive. From now on, every other human being you see is nothing but extra meat that shouldn't be on this planet. Humans are imperfect beings and we must rid this earth of them, don't you agree?" he said and smiled a sinister smile.

Malik was too afraid to respond but nodded. He closed his eyes and tried to remember what a life full of hate and pain was like. When they opened again, there was the Malik I'd see before that had tried to kill me and Yami during Battle City. There was the cold-hearted person who'd used so many to his own destructive pleasures and desires. There was the heart of a killer whose eyes reflected my own almost perfectly. Violet orbs ready to strike and kill in an instant, eyes that will go through any means to accomplish their mission.

Abbie nodded as she walked up to Kaiba. "You've learned well although you have only been here a few weeks my child" then she turned to me. "And you whom I've trained for the past 5 years have done so much as well" She smirked. "I'm quite pleased with both of you, Yuugi, you will help Kaiba in teaching Malik everything there is to know, you have more experience than the both of them. I have done my part" then she disappeared. I sighed. "Goodbye then" I said and turned to Otogi. "She's gone for good now, isn't she?" I said though I knew the answer. Otogi nodded. "She's done what she was obligated to do, though I think she was a bit reluctant to leave. You are one of her best after all" I smirked. "Of course." I said then motioned for Kaiba to show Malik around. "I'll start training you in a few days, Kaiba, teach him what you know. You will receive you first mission in a few days time."

After that, Otogi and I left.

~*~

I sat in my room, sighing. It had been hours since I left Malik and Seto to do, whatever there was to do. Otogi had been sent on another mission and was due back any time later. It was already the dead of the night and he still wasn't back. No matter, I didn't care much. I was just now really bored from a lack of anything to do. I SHOULD be working on my mission but that can wait. I've killed off everyone except for Yami and Isis. Isis, hell I don't where the hell she is and I don't care frankly. 

Yami. That name made so many emotions pass through me. Anger, fury, hate, sorry, pain, anything. I hated more than ever now. I wanted him to die, to die for raping me, to die for not being able to fight against the bitch Anzu's mind control and believing all her sweet-sugary lies. Everything was a lie. My life, who I was, everything. Suddenly, I sensed another presence coming down to my room. It wasn't Otogi...I knew that for certain, he could mask his appearance and surprise me if he wanted to, it was someone inexperienced, someone who didn't' know what to do.

It was Malik.

"To what do I owe this special visit my beautiful blonde friend?" I asked before he could even step in front of the door. I heard a gasp. "Come in" I said dully waving my hand as the door opened by itself. "You don't know how to mask your presence yet, I will teach you that soon" I said. "I could feel your energy walking down throughout the halls" Malik was silent as he nodded. "I have much to learn Yuugi-senpai" he said and plopped down next to me.

"Heh" I said smirking. "What you'll learn from me and Kaiba is just a taste of it all, once you've had you're first kill and cried you blood tears then you'll know what it's like" Malik blinked. "Blood tears?" he asked in disbelief. "Are we so inhuman that we cry the blood of the ones we've killed?" I nodded. "Accept your fate or die Malik" I said without a trace of emotion. "Not even hate should penetrate you, as far as you know, there is no such word as feeling and emotion, there is only those who must be destroyed, and that is everything that is human in the world.

"Blood is the one thing we feed on" I continued. "Once you've had your first taste it will be like sweet honey to your tongue" "I've already tasted blood, the smell is intoxicating" Malik replied leaning back as if he were in rapture. I smirked. "So you have" I replied then leaned in closer to study his features. He truly was a beautiful being. Capable of killing so many in a heartbeat without a single though or conscience. It used to make me sick but then I learned that that was the way of life.

"That's all humans are worth. They are born into this world pure but imperfect, vulnerable to everything and they will believe whatever comes to them. There, they are thrown into a world filled with deep darkness and despair. And what would become of them in this world full of rape and violence. There are hardly any innocents left in this world and what'd left of them they lives will one day break because humans desire those who are completely pure, closed to the outside world, and beautiful. Because such a thing is rare and no one will hesitate to own such a being. It's sick, it's twisted it's wrong. And yet, it happens to millions of people everyday." I said smirking when Malik's eyes widened at my view of the world.

He sighed. "You are right." I said turning away from me. "It's just..." "What?" I asked the smallest bit of curiosity overtaking me. "Well...I never expected to hear it form you, that's all," Malik replied and looked down. My eyes widened and I slapped him. "So you're saying you can't just accept the fact that I've grown up huh? Nobody can! Everyone still thinks I'm a child why do they do that! Everyone pities me! I see it in their eyes, why is it there?!" 

I suddenly found myself crying, the blood spilling out from my eyes. Malik gasped as he reached out to touch my face, finding out in fact that I was telling the truth about our tears. Then his own sprang to his eyes, but they were not like mine. They were pure blood tears while mine were sill diluted with water. I turned away hoping that he wouldn't not see the difference.

"You're different form the rest of them" Malik said turning my head. "YOU still have a chance no matter how hopeless it seems. You're still human deep inside" he said. I clenched my fists and growled. "SHUT UP!" I cried out then punched him. He took the blow pretty hard and fell to the floor. He gasped as he got up then smiled at me. "You know what I'm saying is true, you're still human, you've never managed to become one of them no matter how hard you tried, you're still a human child Yuugi!" he screamed as I hit him over and over again.

"You know I'm telling the truth" he said smiling weakly, once again, like everyone one else, giving me that look that I hated so much. Pity. I didn't want it!! Why did so many feel sorry for me!?!? I rather have their hate than their pity damnit! What's wrong with them? I was about to lay another blow on him when something stopped me.

It was Otogi.

Malik smiled then breathed heavily as his body began to sink into the shadows. He seemed a bit alarmed at first then got the idea. "I guess this means I don't need to run away, I can just disappear" he said as the rest of him sank into the floor almost disappearing from view. "I still feel sorry for you Yuugi, and you know everything I've said is right, somewhere deep inside, you know I'm telling the truth" and then he was gone before I could lash at him again this time permanently making sure he didn't bother me again.

I sighed then fell guilty to Otogi. _Do not let him bother you love_ he told me as he ravished me in kisses and caresses treating me as if I were a precious doll that he wanted to break. _I hate every single one of them _I told him_. They pity me, it shows in their eyes. I want to kill him; I want to strangle him I was to rip out his eyes so I can't see the pity in them. I'd rather have someone, anyone's hate rather than their pity. Pity is for the weak. For those who have..._I shuddered at the thought._ Pity is for those who know emotion. _

Otogi smirked_. They pity you because they think you are weak love. Prove them wrong. Show them that you are not the innocent child you have been portrayed as, show them that you are someone who should be feared, and hunted down. Show them what you have become._ I sighed. _They will not believe me_ I replied letting my clothing fall to the floor. 

_Then **force **them to believe you _Otogi replied biting down hard on my skin. I gasped but let him continue._ Simple as that. You can kill countless victims, in the blink of an eye and not shed a tear. You can bring upon torture to people who have hurt you or sought to hurt. You can make people love you, care for you before betraying their trust and killing them. You are the devil himself, come in the form of an innocent angel. _I laughed. _I am no angel _I replied_. Perhaps you are right. I WILL show them who I am, and what I've become. I shall show them my blood tears... _I stopped.

_What is wrong? _Otogi asked me_. I suddenly began screaming and tearing at my eyes_. Otogi's eyes widened slightly but he understood. He took my hands and nails away from my face._ Do not bruise such a lovely face _he told me kissing the parts where I had hurt myself and watching them heal._ You blood is mixed with water so what? _He asked me._ It means I am not a true assassin, I am still human, Malik was right about me, I still knew what hate and anger were, I had just displayed it out through him._

_Shh...._Otogi replied giving me a heated kiss on the lips._ You will learn, you have learned. You are truly one of us, or soon you will become one. Once you kill **him **you will be free of all emotional attachment. The only thing standing in your way is him, and only him. You must kill him soon. Or the anger inside of you will erode inside and eat alive._

I knew what he was saying was true. It was eating at me. My anger my fury, my hate, everything. I wanted to kill Yami, to hurt him. I never allowed ANYONE to mention his name. The last that did was barely left alive. Not even Otogi dared to mention it even without me there. Of course, he is almost constantly with me.

_I know _I said as we fell into sleep, our bodies entwined.

I woke up later feeling odd. I didn't know why but something was bothering me. I had to leave. I left Otogi sleeping which was ironic; he was usually the one who left me. I felt my body pass through the dimensions and bring me to a cliff that sat by the sea. I knew this place well. This is where I used to come when I felt lonely. I had stopped coming after Yami came into my life because then I'd thought I wasn't lonely anymore. Hell, I was wrong. Now I was more alone more then ever.

My thoughts drifted back to the trial today. Marik and Bakura had failed and as a result, they had died together. Nobody mourned their death, nobody knew they were even there; it was a private judging as all of them are with only a few select invited, if any at all. I thought on what Bakura had told me and what Marik had said. Somehow it had hit me really hard. I had become angered, what he said, what he showed me, it was all haunting me. I didn't know why. Malik had repeated it to me and added even more than I could take. It had angered me, I didn't want to hear it, and it wasn't true. IT WASN'T TRUE.

But then, why had I become angry? Was it because...no...I placed my head in my hands. That's not the reason. NONE of what they said was true. It wasn't. But why had I responded .Why had I cried when I saw Malik pity me? Why did I become furious when someone showed me their pity, why hadn't I killed Yami yet? What if they were right? What if this whole thing was a hoax and that I'd never really become a true killer? All these questions ran through my hand hitting me each screaming for my attention. I suddenly heard those voices again. People's thoughts, they're mourning, they're crying over they're lost ones, their pain. I heard it all. 

What is this? Why am I hearing them? I shut out those voices so long ago. Why were they haunting me? "LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" I cried out knowing that no one would hear me and that my scream only caused more voices to enter my head. I screamed in agony as I saw flashes of people's lives, how happy their lives were how those happy lives were broken through human stupidity. Through greed, through adultery, through rape, smoking, drugs. I couldn't take it. I saw how they lived now; I saw how much they suffered.

I saw the people who I killed; I saw their friends and family still weeping over their losses. I saw even Hikari, who was being beaten by her drunken father. I saw her activate the power I'd given to her; I saw her using it to protect herself. She didn't' not know how to use it so she had hit her father pretty hard. She did not know what to do. She was scared, alone and crying. No one would even lift their dirty human hands to help her. "HIKARI!" I cried out in pain. Her image was now the only thing in my mind as the others dissolved into darkness. She was crying, bleeding from the bruises her father had given her. Her house, if it was even considered one, was mess with vomit and porn all over the place. How could she live like this?! How could that man raise such an innocent child like her in such a horrid place?

She was crying, crying for the mother I had taken away from her so long ago. She was crying for the father she had accidentally killed now. She was crying for me, the person who had totally ruined her life then made it worse by giving he a great power she did not know how to control. She was alone, scared, she did not know what to do. I wanted to go to her; I needed to go to her. This was my fault. I'd destroyed her life just like I'd destroyed my own. No matter what, I was still weak on the inside, I still knew what love and compassion were and deep inside, I'd wished that Yami would forgive me and that we could start over. I hated it. I didn't want to feel this way. I hated Yami, but then why didn't I kill him? Was it because I still care for him? Was it because I was still ready to forgive him after all this time? Was it why my tears carried water along with them when I cried? 

I couldn't take it. "WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?!?!??!!?!?!" I cried out screaming pulling at me hair and digging my nails into my skin so that I could cry real blood. I looked at my tears in disgust; they were still filled with water. They were still watery, diluted. I tore at my eyes with my nails, hoping to rip them out and then I'd truly cry blood. I wanted these images of Hikari to die; I didn't want to do this. I wanted my thoughts to die. I shouldn't be having them. I shouldn't be having doubts! AM I truly still human inside? Am I!?!?!?!?!?!

I screamed and suddenly found myself in Hikari's room. She looked surprised to see me but immediately flew into my arms. "Yuugi! Yuugi!" she cried out. "I killed Daddy I didn't know what I was doing, it wasn't my fault!" she sobbed. Then she gasped when she saw me. "Your face..." she whispered breathlessly. I looked to one of the broken mirrors and saw how horrid my face looked. I had torn the entire skin off form under my eyes and my cheeks and eyes were red and bruised from my tears. The wounds didn't even bother to close themselves up. It stung to have my salty tears on my open wounds but I didn't care. "It's my fault" I said crying even more.

"I'm sorry Hikari" I sobbed. "God! Why is this happening to me? GOD!!!!!!!!!!" I cried out letting the tears roll down my face, regardless of anything else. "Why?! Why me, what is wrong with me?!?!?!" I screamed. Hikari seemed surprised at first, then I felt her wrap he arms around my shoulders. "Yuugi, I'm just like, now, aren't I?" she asked desperately. "Look at me, my tears are red" 

I turned around violently, to see that she was right. "No......." I whispered breathlessly. "NO!!! Not you too!" I cried out then grabbed her before I knew what I was doing. "Not you too! I can't stand it!!" I slapped her over and over and again and her sobs for me to stop were deaf upon my ears. "Why you?! You don't deserve this! You deserve something better Hikari! Stop it! Stop! STOP!!!!!!" But they wouldn't stop. The more I hit her, the more she and even more blood spilled out form her eyes. 

I didn't know what I was doing anymore. All I knew was pain. Hikari can't be one of us. She can't be! She's too pure, too perfect, I won't let her become this...this thing I've become! Why do I feel this way? Why am I afraid she'll become one of us? Why?! Is it because I care for her? How is that possible? I haven't cared for a single living person since my 'death' what's wrong with me!?

Finally, that blood began to disappear. Her tears, became like mine, diluted, and slowly, the blood was fading away. This time, she cried pure human tears, salty and clear. I smiled. "There, that's how it's supposed to be," I said sadly, my damned tears still half human, and half not. "You're better than this Hikari; you can't become one of us. You can't. You're too pure, too beautiful Hikari. I love you. God!" I cried out and cried upon her small form. Now I knew why I felt the way I did. She reminded me of me before I became what I was now. She didn't deserve this life, she was too good, too pure, I won't let her fall to the shadows like I did, I won't!

 Hikari's face was red from being hit repeatedly from me, but at least she didn't look like a killer. "Yuugi-sama...please, let me be with you, you're all I have left!" she cried out and once again, I saw her tears turn red. "I want to be with you, please! I'm a child that nobody wants, everybody says it in school, I want to leave this place, I don't care where you take me, just please take me away Yuugi-sama!" Her tears were pure red. Why was that? WHY?! Aren't they supposed to be like mine? Diluted. They're not. They're pure red! NO, she can't be like this! I wont' let her become a cold blooded killer I won't! It's too painful, I wont' let her become this thing!

I couldn't take it anymore. "Hikari, no!" I pushed her away and beat upon her again so that her tears would once again become pure. "I can't let you become what I am, I just can't! I won't! You deserve better than this, Hikari. Don't you see? Look at me Hikari! I'm a killer, I kill so many people, and I've hurt everyone that's close to them! Hikari, you don't want this, the guilt would eat you alive, you're too pure for this Hikari!" I screamed. "Then kill me," Hikari said desperately. "There's no one left who loves me then" she said coldly, taking one of the kitchen knives. "If you won't take me with you, I'll just die. I'm someone that nobody wants! Yuugi-sama, it's too painful. I can't take it anymore!" Then she placed the knife in my hands. "Kill me," she said desperately. "Kill me now, I want to see Mommy again, kill me Yuugi-sama! If you won't love me, then kill me!!" she screamed.

I stood frozen before, not knowing what to do. Then, I raised the knife, ready to kill her. She tilted her head, so I could easily slit her throat and she'd die quickly. I was ready; I was going to do it. But I couldn't. In anger, I threw the knife out the already broken window. "No! There has to be some other way, there HAS to b! Hikari, you're not going to die, I can't bear it if you die, god! I love you too much Hikari! I've loved you since I first set eyes on you, when I saw that you could look at me without hate in your eyes. I won't let you die but I won't let you become a killer either!" What was this feeling...this emotion inside of me? Why did I let her affect me like this? Why didn't I kill her? Why?!

"Then what do you want me to become?!?!" she screamed at me. "Do you want me to forget all this? I can't, its part of my life Yuugi-sama! I could never live a normal life, not like this! Yuugi-sama, just take me with you, I don't care what I'll have to do, if I must..." here she paused and sobbed quietly before continuing again. "If I must kill in order to be with you, if I must become emotionless, if I must do all these things, I'll do if I can be with you! You're all I have left Yuugi-sama!" her tears were bright red now and I could see the pain in her eyes. She truly didn't want to live anymore; she'd given up all hope a long time ago. That Hikari, the small girl I'd met so long ago in the park, she was under a façade as well, she was desperate. She truly wanted me to make her what I was, or die.

"No!" I cried out. No NO NO!!!!!" This isn't how it's supposed to be! Hikari, I won't let you! You deserve a better life than this." I said trying to reason with her.  "AS WHAT?" she cried out. "As a child that nobody wants?! I can't live like this anymore, everyone made fun of me because they knew what Daddy was doing to me, and yet they didn't say anything. They said I was a child that nobody wanted! I can't live like this anymore Yuugi-sama! Let me go with you; let me become what you are so I can't feel this pain I'm feeling. I don't want to feel it anymore!"

Suddenly, she took a shard of glass from the broken window and held it up to her throat. "If you won't make me what you are then I'll just die, here and now" she said bringing the glass even closer to her throat. "No!" I cried out. No! Hikari! There's got to be another way! Hikari no!" "Make me what you are..." she said breathlessly, sniffling from all her sobs. "I don't care what you make me into, if I'm with you, it'll be okay. Won't it, Yuugi-sama?" This wasn't the girl I'd met so long ago. She was broken, _I'd broken her. She had no one left but me and I was refusing to take her with me. I couldn't. "No...It won't" I said. "You won't be able to take it Hikari; there are better things out there in the world, Hikari please! Don't do this to me! PLEASE!!" I screamed in agony._

Then, I saw her smile. She smiled in happiness. She lowered the glass shard from her neck and walked up to me. At first, I felt happiness when she dropped down the glass. Standing up as high as she could, she closed the distance between us. My eyes widened and I saw tears slip down her cheeks yet she was smiling. I closed my eyes and savored this moment I had with her.

Before I knew she had pulled away. "I love you Yuugi-sama," she said sniffling. But..." she paused and smiled. "I don't like it here anymore. Everyone says I'm a child that nobody wants" "No..." I said softly walking closer to her but she only stepped away. "Hikari..." I said. "What they're saying isn't true, everyone is wanted in this world, EVERYONE! I made that same mistake a long time ago, Hikari, I didn't think anyone wanted me or cared if I was alive but in the back of my mind I know that's not true! Hikari, please..." She shook her head and lifted the glass to her neck once more.

Then, I'll go, I'll go and see Mommy, I hope I'll see you again Yuugi-sama...maybe then, then we can grow together" "NO!!!" I screamed and ran to her but it was too late. She'd cut her own throat by the time I reached her, even with my speed, I couldn't have stopped her because I was letting my human side control me. "Hikari...." I sobbed holding her frail body in my arms. He eyes were half closed but I was sure she could still see me. "Y-Yuugi-S-s-sama" she said breathlessly and touched my cheeks, which now had tears streaming down them. "I...I can see Mommy, she's smiling at me. S-she s-sa-says, she forgives you. Y...Yuugi-Sama...." And then suddenly, her lips were against mine. It was a gentle kiss and I could feel the blood and warmth in her lips. But that slowly diminished and I was soon holding her limp corpse in my arms.

I held her body close to me and cried. I cried out her name so many times I couldn't count, I mourned I hadn't been able to save her, but why was I doing this? I didn't know. I was a killer, I should've killed her when I had the chance, but why did I feel this pain? God! Why did I love her!?

 "There wasn't anything you could do" came a voice form behind me. I turned around then growled at who I saw. Otogi. "You were here, all this time, why didn't you stop her?!?!" I cried out. He shook his head. "It wasn't in my place to interfere; her death was bound to come. Either that, or she'd become one of us."

My eyes widened. If she hadn't died, they were going to turn her. That's why her tears were red. "BASTERD!!!" I cried out dropping Hikari's body and lashing about all my anger at him. He took every blow, but none of them seemed to affect him. He dodged a few, but kept that same emotionless look in his eyes, having neither no pity, nor no sorrow for what had just happened. I raged at him until I felt my energy slipping. Darkness met me, and then I couldn't feel the pain anymore. I couldn't feel Hikari's death; I couldn't feel the bruises I'd given myself.

I couldn't feel anything.

I am Yuugi Muhto, a killer, an assassin, a child. No one believes I am a true killer; they all look at me with pity in their eyes. Why do they do such things? WHY!?!? I am not helpless! I am not weak! I don't regret what I did, I don't!

Ha, who the hell am I kidding?

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And I am done! R/R please, O hope this wasn't TOO bad. Hopefully. I got 92 reviews! *eyes shine* I really hope I get over 100 by the time I finish this story. Hmm...I'm even considering coming BACK into the YGO fandom, that is, if there are still people who want me back. I guess, I'm jumping from fandom to fandom, really, so I might as well finish up my YGO stories since they were my favorite ones to write ^______^ R/R, and tell me if you want me to come back, I'm still considering it.

Buh Bye~

sS

sTaR SNipEr

P.S, I got a new signature too, can you tell? LoL!


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